Godhead Parenting

Godhead Parenting

DRIVER’S SEAT

I had the following vision: I was in the passenger seat while Hudson was driving. He was starting out and very nervous. We went on a very busy and narrow road and drove extremely slow, causing other drivers to get upset and speed past him. I told him to pull over and let the cars pass, but he got nervous and pulled off too quickly, almost causing an accident. He was so nervous simply because it was a new experience for him. A police officer pulled up behind us, and I immediately said, “I will handle this,” and got out of the car. I approached the officer defending my son. The police officer saw me as a threat and drew his weapon. It was a very serious situation. When the vision was over, I was a little startled by it. I asked God what He wanted me to know and heard this: #1. You are not in the driver’s seat of Hudson’s life – he is. #2. You are not the one in final authority – He is. I knew God was showing me that I had overextended my involvement in his life (in a particular area) and was motivated by a lack of trusting God with my son. I repented.

GUILT VS. SHAME

We were sitting in a restaurant when I noticed a mom squeezing the life out of her son’s arm as she yanked him out of the store across the street. The look on her face wasn’t of anger but rage. About ten long minutes later, they came back. She looked like she had released her anger and was now ‘fine’, but the boy’s eyes were swollen and red. As I watched them return to the rest of the family, the boy immediately looked into the eyes of his younger brother sitting across from him and kept giving him pathetic, fake, forced smiles as if to say, “Do you still look up to me?” The shame that was over that boy broke my heart. Guilt is a built-in emotion that God gave us to tell us what we DID was wrong, but shame is what the enemy uses to tell us WHO WE ARE is wrong. Therefore, our parenting should always deal with the guilty person in a way that still communicates they are FULL of worth and value.

SURRENDER ENCOUNTER

It’s time to surrender our children back to the One who is ultimately the only One fully capable of keeping them safe. It’s not all up to you, and the weight of protection does not just rest on your shoulders. God is the One who knit them together. They are HIS, and we must RE-ALIGN ourselves to His role in their lives or we will come under a weight that isn’t ours to carry.

STOP FUNCTIONING

Moms, this one is for you! I have done numerous coaching sessions with the same theme. Moms are overwhelmed, exhausted, feeling a paralyzing heaviness, and like they have been pushed into a dark pit. Each time the Holy Spirit revealed the need to STOP functioning and doing so much and getting in touch with their heart. I don’t need to tell you all that is going on in the world, but if your response to all of the chaos, stress, and anxiety is to DO MORE and stay active to avoid your heart, you are going to find yourself in a dark pit of heaviness. Your heart matters because God wired it to feel and with the need to be heard. So may I encourage you to spend some time today putting your hand on your heart and asking, “Heart, how are you feeling today?” and just let it be heard. Sometimes you have to mother your own heart. God cares and wants to hear what is concerning you today.

SOLO PARENTING

Solo parenting has been one of the greatest challenges I have faced in life and the area where I have reaped the most. I have never felt like a ‘single mom’ because it was through our loss that I discovered a side of God as my Husband, Provider, and Protector. We parent together, and it has been my greatest joy in life to see Him reveal Himself to my children and what concerns them. It is so important that solo parents learn how to connect with God so that they don’t attempt to be both roles. When a parent attempts to be both mom and dad, the child loses the absent part and part of the present parent because they are so exhausted trying to be both. It is better to have one fully present parent than an exhausted, burnt out one.

HIS YOKE IS LIGHT

God’s yoke is light. That includes parenting. If that is not how you would describe your parenting, perhaps something needs to come in alignment to get under His yoke.

HE IS WITH US

There isn’t a mom out there who can’t identify with my friend:

“This week, one of my kiddos is trying out for a new sport. For a few reasons, there is a good chance he won’t make the team. He knows this but is hopeful and excited to give it a go. I love this! At the same time, it stirs emotions in my own heart of fear. I think it triggers the times I faced disappointment or rejection as a kid and also stirs my mama heart that wants to protect my kids from any pain. But the truth is that facing disappointment is not the source of our greatest pain. Our greatest pain comes when we have to walk through troubles and disappointments alone. On the flip side, knowing that there is always someone by our side to walk through the ups and downs of life gives us strength and courage to face the big emotions that come with disappointment and find our way back to joy. As I was meditating on this thought, I heard a song on my computer that reiterated this point (Highs and Lows by Hillsong). It was as if God was confirming in my heart that He is with my kids through all they face in life and that He is with me. God tells us not to fear – not because trials won’t come, not because we will feel no pain in life, but because He is with us. What great comfort and encouragement this brings to my soul.”

WELL DONE

I have tears as I type this. God knows the safest place for His children is in His will, close to His heart, and following His voice. He has been so tender and good with us to remove the things that stand in our way. He has been patient and kind, but we all have our own choice of how we are going to respond. Are you willing to stay in the frying pan until He declares you ‘well done’? Are you willing to have a season of dying and death to the things you have held onto for so long? Are you willing to praise Him even when circumstances scream otherwise? Are you willing to surrender it all? Are you willing to say yes and follow even when His ways are not your own? He knows the future, the next chapter, and what’s coming, and He knows how to lead His children into the safety of His wing. There are so many stories of many of you saying YES and seeing Him in the land of the living like never before. May we not count the cost but count the reward of saying YES to Him.

BREAKING VOWS

Have you ever declared, “I will never parent like my mother?” This is a dangerous declaration and must be broken. Why? Because we yoke ourselves to whatever we judge. If your parenting goal is not to become like your mother, then she is your standard, and we always end up being the thing we focus on. Jesus calls us to put our eyes on Him.

Pray – “I break agreement with the vow that I will never parent like my mother. I declare that my mom was on a journey, as I am on my own. I will put my eyes on Jesus, and He will make all crooked places straight as I seek Him to do better for my children.”

TRUE REVIVAL

Who wants this?

“‘But for you who fear My name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings, and you will go out and leap like calves from the stall. Then you will trample the wicked, for they will be ashes under the soles of your feet on the day I am preparing,’ says the LORD of Hosts” (Malachi 4:2-3).

I see HEALING, EMPOWERMENT, and AUTHORITY in this verse. What if REVIVAL wasn’t something that we were to champion to make happen but more so to do our part, and it was a natural fruit or expression of God? I believe Malachi 4:6 is the recipe for true revival. Your part – Listen to those who are leading you back to family and turn to your child. “And he will turn the hearts of the parents to their children, and the hearts of the children to their parents; or else I will come and strike the land with total destruction” (Malachi 4:6).