I believe with all my heart that we can teach children how to effectively deal with the hurts, lies, and offenses that come their way and put the ‘Band-Aid’ businesses out of work in their generation. What if the next generation was taught how to deal with the ‘hooks’ and had no need for the sex industry? What if they had no taste for drunkenness? What if their hearts were so whole that they spent their money advancing the Kingdom instead of nursing wounds?
If we focus on being a perfect parent and handling everything just right, we will surely fail because Jesus is the only perfect human. However, our weaknesses, failures, wounds, and mistakes do not disqualify us from equipping our children with the truth that while we may have blown it, Holy Spirit is never impatient or annoyed with us. While Dad might be distracted or absent, Papa God is always eager for our attention and company. Where Mom may lack, He always provides. Where we stumble, He is able. How will children know this unless we actively teach them about the faithfulness of God? So, the next time you blow it, use it as an opportunity to teach your child how awesome and good Father God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit really are and that while we try, we are not always like Him, but praise God, He isn’t like us either!
Not everything you hear is God – in fact, some of it is pure trash from the enemy.
Ask, “Jesus, what is something I have spoken about myself recently that needs to be taken out to the trash?”
Write it down and then prophetically trash it.
Then ask, “Jesus, what is Your truth?”
Gather as a family in the living room, in the car, at the dinner table, or bedtime, and ask Jesus together. This is so empowering for children because they get to witness how God communicates with you, which increases their faith, and together you get to encounter Him. Spiritual hearing is a muscle that is strengthened by worshiping and praying. The more you do it, the stronger you become at it.
A lady in her 40’s was so paralyzed by groups that she would not attend classes, go to Bible studies, church, restaurants, or anywhere else where large groups gathered. Finally, she could not take the isolation anymore and began seeking help. When they asked Jesus to show her the first time she felt paralyzed by a large group, she recalled the story of when she was just three years old and remembered feeling loved and secure with her large family. They were at her house, and there was a lot of excitement and love, but on a particular day, when she walked into the room, they all hushed really quickly, and she could tell that something was wrong. They all just stared at her, and the silence was paralyzing and awkward for her. For years the question, “What is wrong with me?” haunted her. Jesus showed her that the family was in town for her surprise birthday party and that they were all discussing how they would surprise her. When she walked in, they all got silent, not wanting to ruin the surprise.
Doesn’t that story break your heart? ONE lie for FORTY years! But this is what I want you to see – when the heart splinter (in this case, a lie of “what is wrong with me?”) entered, it was the PARENTS who surely saw a change in their daughter. You cannot believe a lie like that and not have it change how you think, feel and act. Had the parents been empowered to help her, the splinter could have been pulled in childhood.
Has your child had increased outbursts of anger? This can be a very challenging thing to parent because of the mess anger can make emotionally and with connection. However, I encourage you to ask Holy Spirit to give you eyes to see what is UNDER the anger. Typically, under anger are the emotions of being sad, scared, or lonely. If you can ask Holy Spirit to show you, you will be able to minister to their real heart instead of just managing their behavior.
P.S. This isn’t just for kids!
Do you have bad days? Want to learn how to flip them for good? Be encouraged by this testimony from a mom.
“The kids have been at each other all week long. I have felt tired and overwhelmed and just wanted a break. The other night, it had reached terrible limits. My patience was so thin. So, when my middle child, usually one so full of delight, ran away from me in a fit of anger that was so unlike her and hid in her room, I was angry. The Lord whispered to me, reminding me that this was a special moment. I listened to Him. I went up to her, and though she turned away from me, I sat next to her and hugged her. I asked her what was wrong, and she shared. I began to ask her if what she was feeling was true or a lie. She identified it as a lie. Then I reminded her that God never lies. I asked her where the lies were coming from. And from there, I spoke the truth over her. The truth of God. It was such a beautiful moment. One that had been so charged with anger only minutes before had become a time for me to affirm my daughter.”
This is PROFOUND and such a powerful move of God! God is using this generation of parents to stand tall, whole, and in alignment with the Father’s heart. They are doing the hard heart work to be free of past issues, and God is redeeming things they did/didn’t receive in childhood. Parents are learning how not to parent out of the place of woundedness and lack and are raising their children to be healthy and whole. Their children are feeding out of their hands of wholeness, love, and connection. At the same time, because of their profound healing, they are extending forgiveness, healing, and revelation to their parents (grandparents) to give them what their parents weren’t able to give them. Adult children are the ones bringing healing to their parents and setting them free from the guilt, shame, and lies that have held them back for decades. God is bringing so much healing and freedom to THREE generations in one. YES, LORD!
As a prophetic act, say out loud, “GOD IS REDEEMING MY FAMILY LINE.” I declare that you will enter into the fullness God has for you, your children, and your parents.
Do you long to be the parent you dreamed of when you were younger? Do you desire a deeper connection with your children? Is peace in your home something you crave? I declare it is possible as I have seen it in the lives of parents across the globe!
Today is VALIDATION DAY!!!!
I know we have all been through a lot these past years. We each have walked through our own circumstances and hardships and have had to find our way. For me, it meant transitioning across the country, not once, but twice, living out of a suitcase for a year (it was the biggest blessing but also not home), having four kids home full time needing my time and attention, plus trying to run a full-time ministry, keeping up with travel schedule and appointments, remaining on the front lines helping so many families in despair and heartbreak, continuing to walk out my own journey, being there for the children and their needs, etc. It has been hard at times. I have felt stretched beyond the familiar. I have had to hold my ground with my YES, as well as my NO. I have had to stay uber-intentional and focused. And yet here I am nearly two years later, and 3 of the kids are off IN school full time. This morning is the day I have had my eyes set upon – the day things would go back to somewhat normal, and I could find some breathing room (don’t get me wrong, I would rather have my kids home full time all the time, but it isn’t normal or practical to do it all). Orphans have pity parties and feel sorry for them that life is so hard. They feel overwhelmed by being a victim. As a Daughter, I don’t give in to the pity party of one, but I do host VALIDATION PARTIES where I sit and validate myself. I give my journey, the hardship, the demands, and the cost a voice. I put my hand on my heart and say, “You may not have done that perfectly, but girl, you did it, and I am so proud of you. I see how hard that was, and you stayed in the game. It makes me sad you had to carry so much, but you found a deeper pocket of His grace, and you did it – together.” I love myself in my journey because, at the end of the day, I am doing the best job I know how to do for myself, my family, and the mandate on my life.
YOU deserve a party too. Why not grab your journal and write yourself a sweet note of grace and validation?
