WE ALL NEED HIM

WE ALL NEED HIM

  • Encouragement, Godhead Parenting

WE ALL NEED HIM

I often hear comments about how ‘easy’ it is for me to partner with God in my parenting, as if somehow I have an easy button in parenting because of it (huh?). Yep! I have pressed into hearing Him for my children. Yep! I have some history with Him. Yep! I have faith that He will show up, reveal, and help me. Yep! I have a partner in parenting. But I STILL have to: Exercise that muscle! Make a choice to go to Him! Intentionally listen to Him! Be uncomfortable in the waiting! Trust that He knows more than I do! Surrender my children! I am in a season now where I feel utterly clueless, do not know what to do, and have Mama Bear emotions over my child’s choices. I, too, can often feel like I am at square one in my parenting. My history serves as evidence that He is faithful, but I still have to choose Him and do my part over and over and over again. That is how we build HIStory and partner with Him.

APRIL SHOWERS

I heard the Lord say to me, “April showers bring May flowers,” and was reminded of the scene in The Shack where Sarayu (Holy Spirit) was collecting the tears of Mack, who was deeply grieving the devastating loss of his daughter. Later in the movie, Sarayu used those same tears to water the seeds that would become a massive tree. God is doing something profoundly deep within you in this season. Spiritual Daughters, I am so proud of you! I am proud of the one who stepped away and caught her breath. I am proud of the one who went outside to let the tears flow. I am proud of the one who chose faith over fear. I am proud of the one who showed her gorgeous vulnerability. I am proud of the one who sobbed in her closet. I am proud of the one who called a friend and shared her heart. I am so proud of the one who owned her heart and what she was feeling. I am so proud of the one who kept her eyes on Jesus. I am proud of the one who dropped to her knees, asking God for help. I am so proud of you for choosing to let God have His way with you and not medicating your heart with the novocain of the world. The only way to lessen the pain is to feel it. Let Jesus continue to have His way with you, and He will allow those tears to blossom into something so beautiful.

VINE AND THE BRANCH

I was talking to a friend about an area in my life that is causing a lot of stress and worry. She brought me to John 15’s story about the vine and the branch, which gives us the key to bearing fruit (which I was not having in this area). Together, we asked Jesus to show us the separation, and I heard “tourniquet,” a device that cuts off the blood flow. Hmmm. That is kind of what it felt like. I asked Jesus what the key to removing the tourniquet was, and I kept hearing “turn, turn, turn, turn,” but it sounded like the word tourniquet was stuck on a broken record, and it didn’t make sense to me at first. I asked Jesus to clarify, and He said, “You keep turning and turning and turning, and the more you move, the more it is cutting off the life-giving flow between us. Stop moving and REMAIN in me.” 

The Vine and the Branches – John 15:1-8 – “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.” 

Sometimes the best thing to do is to do nothing and hand over the reins back to Him.

LOOKING THROUGH GOD’S EYES

“You can’t. You are a single mom.” I will honor those involved by not sharing details, but I have been told this on more than one occasion over the years. The first time was when God called me to go on a mission trip. I had no desire to go, yet He began to speak to me so clearly that I gave Him my ‘yes,’ and within a week, all the funds came in. I was told, “There is no way God would call a single mom to go.” Those words stung! I beg to differ. Jesus always went after the weak, the sick, the broken, the least of these, and those overlooked. It isn’t the ‘less than’ part that qualifies a person. It is what Jesus does IN the weakness. Our weakness simply becomes the ground in which we are aware of our need for Him. No one needs to convince a solo parent (or their children) that God’s best is a family with both a mother and father, but it is incorrect to disqualify someone based on weakness alone. Judge them based on what God does through the weakness. Man may need a perfectly polished resume to qualify you, but God does not.

MY FIRE

I had a dream. We were having a gorgeous church potluck-style gathering in a massive lodge. There was so much activity going on, from bean bag tosses to archery to great food. Everyone was lively and having a great time. Something caught my eye, and I wandered outside, where I found these larger-than-life boulders that you had to climb down a bit to get to this raging bonfire that radiated heat. It was memorizing. Many fires were going on, but each required some effort to get close to it. I was lonely outside by myself, so I decided to go back to where the party was, but as I did, I noticed a fire at the end that was really bright, and I wondered if it was unmanaged or even getting out of control. I hiked to it and found the most beautiful fire sitting all by itself. It felt so strange to have a fire with no one around. I wanted to be with the people but couldn’t abandon the fire. I woke up and heard the Lord say, “My people do not know how to be entertained by MY fire.” There has been a profound invitation to be still and at peace with His fire and to allow it to transform as fire transforms whatever it consumes. I am finding a place of peace I am not sure I have ever encountered.

How about you? Are you still longing for the party, or have you wandered alone to the fire? 

OWN IT!

I have always wanted my twin daughters to share a room, but God told me to separate them and give them their own space. We had so much fun talking about designing their new spaces. Lauren turned her closet into a desk area, and it was gorgeous. Emma walked into Lauren’s room and saw the hours of work, and said, “Oh man, your room looks better than mine,” She went back to her room and undid all of her work, trying to copy what Lauren did with her space. It didn’t work! She was frustrated and struggling a bit. I realized that was such a prophetic word for what God is doing in them. I told her that Lauren’s space was perfect for her, but that Emma needed to own hers and that copying or comparing herself to her twin would only leave her feeling short, frustrated, and defeated. She quickly turned her room back the way she first had it and LOVED it. Isn’t that true in life? We can’t slap someone else’s success on us and assume it fits. Thank You, Jesus, for the way You are parenting with me and aligning their hearts daily to the path YOU have for them.

INCREASE HUNGER

I tell people often, “Do you pray to be filled by God? Pray for hunger because people that are full become content and lazy. Hungry people will do whatever it takes to be fed.”

GOD SEES MY CHILD

My voice is a broken record as I state over and over and over that if the Father looks at the heart, so should we in our parenting. God told me years ago, “Stop denying my daughter her dog,” and with that, I moved into another home just to get her a dog. I am not a dog lover, and it was a hard thing for me to obey. God has surely been good on His word, and Boo has brought so much healing to her heart over the years. 

MY AUTHORITY IN JESUS

God spoke to me years ago and said, “The same spirit you are encountering in the church is the same spirit that was in operation in your childhood. The reason it is so painful is that you endured it in childhood but did not overcome it.” It was so true. When my mom passed away, I no longer encountered that spirit with her and never learned how to defeat it. When I was faced with it again in the church, God was teaching me not to endure it, as I did as a little girl, but to rise up and defeat it. While I have no authority over someone else’s free will, I had all of the authority given to me by Jesus to demolish that spirit from operation in my life and coming under it. After God spoke this to me, this is how I responded: I had to first discern that it was a spirit and not me. Then I had to discern what was the spirit in operation. I asked Jesus to give me the strategy to defeat and overcome that spirit. I am intentional about releasing the opposite spirit. Where I wanted God to save me from it, He wanted to teach me my authority in Him.

HE IS HERE

God is not standing over you, watching you parent, or keeping track of your every wrong move. He is geared up, ready to jump in the moment you invite Him. So, give it a try today. Having a hard mommy moment? Frustrated over a child’s behavior? Hit with big news? Invite Him in and watch and see how He encounters you IN the moment.

MODEL HIS LOVE

My friend said it beautifully: “God showed me that the purpose of my parenting is not to turn my children into models (in whichever field), but for me to model His love to them. After that, the rest will fall into place automatically.”