I had to take a moment to process my heart in the midst of so much movement. I began to feel good about all that I have been able to accomplish in a short amount of time between packing, cleaning, selling items, arranging details, canceling utilities, securing housing, saying goodbyes, homeschooling, and on and on. I stopped myself from saying aloud, “I am a ROCKSTAR!”. I saw a mental picture of how weary and exhausted I was earlier in the week, and I heard God say, “No, I AM,” and I began to cry. Oh yes, yes, yes. It is YOU who gave me the grace and strength to accomplish all that I am able to accomplish. It is YOU who showed up in my weakness and made me strong. It is YOU who sustained me with Your power to end well. It is YOU who never left me. It is YOU who walked me through this part of my journey just like You have every other one. 2 Corinthians 12:7-10 – “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.”
THE GREAT I AM
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“I felt immensely inadequate. One day I just fell to the ground in tears and cried out, ‘God, I cannot do it all; I am not capable! My children need more than me; I am not enough!’ He said back to me, ‘I am enough, teach them to come to Me!’ BOOM! Right there, I realized so much of me was still working in my own efforts, and the Holy Spirit corrected me; He is what they need, not me. They needed to learn to go to Him, hear Him, and know Him. I love this lesson and the steps to guide our children to get to the source of the issue. So many times, we circle around the issues repeatedly, never getting to the root of the problem. In our own human efforts, we try to gain ground by dealing with the superficial symptoms instead of addressing the true issues, the hurt, the lie, or the offense. When we take ourselves out of the picture and teach our children to go to Daddy, He is the one that can deal with the truth of the circumstances, and He does it SO much more efficiently than I do. I hope to embed these steps more and more as I lead the hearts of my children. I hope to grow them up in a way where they are empowered. I am, again, thankful that God has led me to this class to bring more focus and direction in leading my children by the Spirit.”
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A mom shares: “There was a lot going on for me this month and I am certainly not where I started. I felt like each lesson had just the right wisdom for what I was experiencing on a certain day. I have learned and felt more of who God is. I have received healing from past hurts and grown in being more of a Daughter. I have also learned a lot about my authority. And that’s just me. I appreciate all of the tools that I have already tried with my children.”
I was in a really intense season – probably the most significant spiritual battle I have ever walked through. Sometimes you just get credit for staying in the game and not quitting. Yet here we are, sitting as a family, all on our laptops, writing out our testimonies to encourage others. I have tears in my eyes looking around the room at my kids typing away, eager to share their journey with others. The enemy may do his thing, but GOD is still on His throne, and as for this house, we serve the LORD!
When you partner with the pressure of perfection, you will reap anxiety, worry, and lack of joy. On the other hand, when you partner with His perfection, you will reap peace, joy, abundance, clarity, movement, and solutions in your parenting.
How many of you would love to have someone there to encourage you, guide you, give you specific wisdom in your situation and help coach you through life? We all do, right? The WORD is your parent, mentor, and guide. We can proactively read the Word – read for the sake of spending time with Him without an agenda AND/OR We can read the Word based on what we are going through. Pinpoint the issue; conflict, anger, strife, fear, provision, etc., and then spend time researching what the Word has to say about it. I can’t tell you how powerful, validating, and encouraging this has been for me over the years. The counsel of man is fantastic in its rightful place, but some issues and situations are reserved for God’s opinion, counsel, and guidance. God has given us an outline of how to respond to a situation and conduct our lives SO THAT it goes well with us. Let Him lead and teach you through His Word.
Every day is Mother’s Day. Those who lay down their life hourly to serve the little ones, do the hard heart work, intentionally teach, train and equip their children. Allow God to mold you through the adventures of motherhood. Clean up your mess so your children won’t have to fall and get back up again… and again! Learn to love yourself, pursue God and usher Him into your homes. Model your family after His and walk in your authority. Align your mind, body, and spirit to Him. To the world, you are a mother, but to your family, you are the world. I am honored to run with so many of you as you change the world one family at a time.
Does anyone ever have a moment when God shows you something in your parenting, and you feel profound guilt and shame? Instead of viewing the revelation through the eyes that you have harmed or hindered your child, view it through the eyes of God using your child to restore what was lost in you. The sudden attack of condemnation is the enemy’s attempt to remind you of your lack so that you do not partner with God’s goodness and redemption. You have permission to step over the condemnation and fully embrace God’s goodness and kindness towards you.
Corporate love works well for the one in authority but not so much for the receiver because it denies their creative expression and teaches them they need to look like, sound like, and act like everyone else. Each child is different, and we must learn how to dance with them alone. They have different styles, personalities, likes, interests, talents, desires, and ways of connecting. The sooner we realize this as parents, the greater joy there will be in our homes. It is impossible for a child to feel seen, heard, and valued when expected to be someone other than who God knits them together to be.
Examples of corporate love: expecting everyone to work, eat, get dressed, and do homework at the same speed. Some children just move faster/slower.
Expecting everyone to respond to the same style of communication. Some children need things spelled out more, said with greater tenderness or more engagement, such as eye contact.
Expecting everyone to adjust to your spoken love language. Children speak their own language and may not have a natural high appreciation for yours.
Expecting everyone to value and appreciate what you value and appreciate. Some children are just simply not going to follow in your footsteps but need to find their own journey.
Expecting everyone to be happy when you are happy, tired when you are tired, or hungry when you are hungry. Children have different needs based on their own bodies.
Ask Jesus to show you if you are expecting your children to be mini-you’s in an area that God wants them to BE who He created them to simply be.
The kids wanted to go somewhere alone, and I had mixed feelings about it. As I processed my thoughts, I told them, “You can go, but only if you listen to your babysitter.” They looked at me like I had three heads. Surely they were too old for a babysitter. I told them Holy Spirit was their babysitter, and if they agreed to listen to whatever He instructed them to do, I was fine with them going. They agreed, and I was able to hand them over to their sitter just like I did when they were younger, leaving them for the first time. I love how I can actively give my children the freedom to grow up yet trust Him to guide and protect them.
Get out your journal and recall the last time you had an above-average reaction to something your child did. Ask Jesus some questions and allow Him to minister to your heart. Do not be introspective; instead, ask and listen to what He has to share.
Ask, “Jesus, was this their issue or mine?”. If it was your issue, ask, “Jesus, what was my heart feeling at the time? What made my heart so uncomfortable at that moment? When was the first time I felt that emotion? What did my heart need?”
Use these questions the next time your child triggers you and allow those uncomfortable moments to be the times you are molded to be more like Jesus. We don’t want our wounds or lack to parent our children. We want to parent from a place of wholeness and freedom. Understanding this is important because we often react to our children who aren’t doing anything wrong. Yet our reaction, out of a wounded or hurt place, teaches them that it is not okay to be who God made them to be. Allow Him to parent you through your child! I am proud of you for doing the hard things so that your child doesn’t reap the fruit of our wounds.