PUPPY LOVE

PUPPY LOVE

This is where parenting becomes FUN! A prophetic act is simply acting out a Biblical principle, Scripture, or character of God to help people grasp His truth. You could all fold your hands, close your eyes, bow your heads, pray, or do a prophetic act to align your heart with His.

Play a game and have everyone act like a dog. Joy breaks out when Mom begins to bark, and Dad sticks out his tongue, wagging his tail. Ask everyone to act out being excited when the owners come home. Act out the dog being hungry and getting his food. How about playing with other dogs?

Then have them act out a dog being scared and nervous. The joy and confidence in the room moves to quiet and timidness. Sometimes when dogs are scared or stressed, they bite. 

Gather the kids and explain that dogs are designed to be playful and joyful, but when put in situations that make them overwhelmed, they can become very intimidated or aggressive. What does the dog need at that moment? An owner who loves them enough to protect them.

Explain that we can be like the dog at times and how we ‘bite’ those we love when we feel overwhelmed and stressed. But we have a God who is like the owner who loves, protects, and leads us. 

In the days ahead, when your child is acting like a stressed dog, remind them of this teaching and help usher them to God’s truth that they are okay and this will work out, He cares about their heart, and it will be okay. Remind them that their job is to be full of joy and love while God handles the details.

PRIORITIZE THE BIG STUFF FIRST

Grab a jar/bowl, sand (or small pebbles), and larger rocks. 

Call a FAMILY MEETING and talk to the children about Matthew 6:33 – “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” What does this mean exactly? 

Take the jar/bowl and explain how their capacity of time is given in each 24-hour period. Part of their time is spent sleeping, eating, doing homework, etc. Make a list of each thing that demands their time every day and then pour a little sand into the jar representing each thing. Brushing teeth… add a little sprinkle of sand into the jar. Taking out the trash… add a little sprinkle of sand into the jar, etc. 

Now take some larger rocks and explain how that represents seeking God such as reading the Word, praying, declaring His truth, etc. The larger rock no longer fits because they have filled up their jar with the smaller things.

Dump the jar out and put the larger rocks in FIRST and then add the sprinkles of sand which will make its way around the rock, that way everything fits in the jar in the proper order, and no one can say at the end of the day they ran out of room (time) because they put the important thing in first.

FEEDING THEIR SPIRIT

Gather the kids and talk about the importance of feeding their bodies with healthy food. Remind them of the difference between sugar treats and healthy foods that produce fuel for their growing bodies. What would happen if they skipped a meal or a day’s worth of eating? Their tummy would begin to rumble, and soon, their discomfort would affect their emotions. Then talk about how God has given them a brain to think and how significant our thoughts are. If we say to ourselves, “I am stupid,” we will begin to feel stupid and eventually will act stupid. God wants us to feed our minds with thoughts that are in alignment with what He thinks about us, “I am priceless,” “I matter,” “My voice is significant,” “I am loved.”

Talk about our spirits and the importance of feeding our spirit with life-giving things such as worship, talking with God, hearing what He has to say to others, reading the Word, loving others, thanking Him, asking Him for help, sharing testimonies, etc. When we feed our spirit with things like fear, lies, nursing hurts, offenses, and being entertained by the things of the enemy (murder games, violence, etc.), we will have a much harder time experiencing His love which He designed to be poured out to those around us. He still loves us, but our ability to receive and embrace it is affected. I often use this language with my children, especially after I notice the fruit of not being fed, “Hey, what have you done lately to feed your spirit? It looks to me like you might need to sneak away and spend some time with Jesus.” Or “Wow, that comment was not very kind. What things are you feeding your mind lately?”

All of these things are like putting a spoonful of fresh, organic veggies in our mind and spirit. Failure to feed our mind and spirit leaves us dry, empty and feeling disconnected. Help your children make a list of ways they can feed their mind and spirit and then feed them daily.

THE SMILE GAME

We played the greatest game when the kids were younger, called the Smile Game!

Before we got out of the van at the grocery store, Wal-Mart, or a restaurant, we all talked about the game and would remind everyone how to play it. Then, when we got out of the van, each of us had to give as many people as possible direct eye contact and smile really big, each keeping score of how many smiles we would get in return.

The game was hilarious, and joy always broke out. The kids would often be up to 50 returned smiles, reminding them that releasing the Kingdom is about JOY. It also showed them how to flip the atmosphere where most people do not acknowledge a single person in front of them.

FILLING THEIR TANKS

I knew one of my kid’s love tanks was low with her sibling because of the way he treated her. Hours later, he came to her with a request. I could predict her response, “NO!” Not because she really cared or didn’t want to give it to him, but because she had little in the ‘love tank.’ He tried to cash in a favor, and her tank was so low she didn’t want to give it to him. I responded by saying, “Sweetie, if you want to walk in favor with her, you might want to work on filling her love tank.”

Want to teach this to your children? Here is a great exercise. Call a family meeting and sit around the table. In the center, place a large bowl of water filled to the top. Give each family member a glass and a spoon. Tell them that you are going to play a timed game of seeing how full you can get everyone’s glass by putting the spoon in the center bowl and scooping up the water and placing it in their glass. The rule is that no one can fill their own glass, just everyone else’s. At the end of a minute, see which glass is the fullest and which one is the least. Share with the children that the center bowl represents God’s love, which is full and plentiful. We can grab His love anytime we want, and it is always there. Share that each glass represents their family member’s hearts, and the spoon represents our words, actions, choices, and interactions. Either we are putting love into their tank or choosing not to.

HELPING CHILDREN OVERCOME TRAUMA

Trauma – a deeply distressing or disturbing experience.

Think for a moment about your child’s life back in 2020. Perhaps it wasn’t perfect, but within a short time, your child was thrown into a whirlwind of being home 24/7. Not being able to see friends or go out to the park, learning without peers, sitting in front of a computer, many faced hours alone as their mom and dad still worked. Some went without food, increased sibling conflict, missed birthday parties, felt fear all around them, not being able to go to church or their favorite store, and then the anger and violence that was unleashed in nearly every city. Most adults can’t comprehend all that is going on, much less a child whose brain isn’t fully developed. Folks, this is trauma. Add another layer of what was released in the atmosphere and the paralyzing fear, worry, and anger that slimed people without notice or warning. Kids feel it too.

While I am not trying to create a doomsday post, there is a reality that this past season has been brutal for some children. The events themselves do not bring damage to children. How adults respond to trauma can make a challenging event a lifelong wound. Your role is KEY! #1. Know your child’s love language and fill it DAILY! Five minutes of intentional “I see you” can fill their heart. #2. Connection – Talking, engaging, asking questions, hugging, smiling, listening, etc. Merely hanging out 24/7 is not the same as actually connecting to their hearts. #3. Joy releases a chemical in our brain that increases our will to fight and endure hard things. Dance parties, giggles, wrestling matches, dinner in the living room, tickling, being silly, special treats, dancing on the bed, or splashing in the rain. Your child NEEDS joy!

I know it is hard to give when you are enduring the same battle, but your response in this hour matters. Help children overcome by filling them up with love, connection, and joy, which are heaven’s tools to overcome. 

Validation – recognition or affirmation that a person or their feelings or opinions are valid or worthwhile. Validation is not trying to move someone out of their space but giving them permission to be where they are at.

It is saying things like: I am sorry that _____.” “It is not okay that _____.” “It makes me mad that_____.” “You didn’t deserve that.” “That must have been so hard when_____.” “Man, that stinks!” “You are so much more than that.”

PLAYDATES

Playdates are the best kind of summer school.

There is nothing sweeter than a playdate on a lazy summer afternoon. These can be the best outlets for training ground with your children. Host a playdate and let your child play naturally like they usually would do, but keep within earshot of them interacting with their friends. What are you hearing? What are you seeing? Are they being kind and gracious and putting other people first, or do they need help in these areas?

After the playdate is over, sit down and have a conversation with them or role-play some of the things that have happened. Empower them by explaining how they could have done it differently or show them new skills to apply in those same situations. After a few days, invite that friend over again and see how they implement the tools. I encourage you to remind them before the playdate about the tools or maybe even have hand signs as code words. Perhaps they need to learn to put their friends’ desires first, so maybe you want to have a code word of putting up your pinky finger. This keeps your child protected from shame in front of their friends and is the little code word between the two of you where you are letting them know they need to increase putting other people first.

Children have both strengths and weaknesses. Let me give you an example of how a child’s strengths can turn into a weakness. My daughter is a super strong leader. I probably would have let her stay at home and babysit at the age of 5 if it was legal. But because she’s such a strong leader, and has the end result as her focus, she has little regard for the success of others. I do not want to shut down her strength, but I do want to strengthen her weakness. So while the leadership skills will be there no matter what, I have intentionally gone after teaching her to lead in love. We have talked about it, role-played and I have given her plenty of intentional situations in which she can apply leadership in love.

Tell them stories about your friends growing up. What are some things that your friends did that made you come alive and felt very important?. What are some things your friends have done over the years that have hurt your heart or shaped who you are in a way that God did not intend?

Do you have kids who like to interrupt you? I taught the kids in the time of peace what I expected, and then we role-played, practiced, and got good at the technique before we were in ‘need’ of it. I explained that they are SOOO important, but so am I. When I am in the middle of something with someone ELSE, I need the respect of not having someone demanding my attention elsewhere. We had FUN role-playing what a demanding child looks like when Mama is talking to someone else or on the phone. We talked about WHY interrupting wasn’t okay and how it made others feel. The bottom line it is a self-control issue. I instructed them to put their hand on my arm, which signaled, “Mom, I need you.” It is important then for the adult to put their hand over their hand, which means, “I see you.” Then, when the timing was appropriate, I would say, “Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, could you hold for a moment?” and would direct my attention to them. If they came barging into the room or demanding my attention, I would simply say, “Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, could you hold on for a moment?” And then I would say out loud to my child, “You are so important, but so is Mrs. Smith. I need you to wait until I am done,” and then when I got off the phone, we would role-play and practice again. My kids use this tool to this day, and it is golden to have respectful kids who know how to wait their turn.

Teach this to your child and then set up a playdate specifically to practice this way of learning how to get your attention when you are busy.

Childhood is not the season to expect perfection but to give them the tools to live successful lives.

MOM’S REPORT CARD

Every once in a while, the Lord nudges me to be a student of my children’s evaluation of me as a mom. I have authority in the home, but that doesn’t mean I can’t learn from my children. I called a family meeting and reminded each of them of a recent event where they made a mess. I asked them to come up with a list together on #1. What could I have done better (in that situation), and #2. What did their heart need from me? They went to the back room and began to create a list of answers. While I already knew the areas I could improve in as a parent, what was highlighted was their deepest desire for me to HELP them in their mess. It is so easy for a parent to focus on the fruit of their choices, but I was given yet another reminder to stay focused on empowering them with tools and solutions to not only clean up the mess but also prevent them in the future. This is a profound way to let their voices be heard now, in childhood, about the things their heart needs.

GET YOUR UNDERWEAR ON!

Gather the family in the family room and talk about underwear! It is rather personal, isn’t it? But many would argue that it’s absolutely essential.

Have everyone take out a piece of paper and draw some fancy pants (underwear). Color it as you please. Wad the paper up in a ball and tell everyone to hide it somewhere outside – between the rocks, in the tree, by the bush, under the trash cans.

Come back in and read together Jeremiah 13: 1-14. I like to read The Message Bible as it often explains it in a language children can grasp easier.

Go after the heart of the passage. There is one thing God is wanting from us – to LISTEN!

In a day or so, gather everyone in the family room and remind them of this activity. Go on a tour outside to find the wadded-up underwear drawing and talk about how the paper got ruined, damaged, or destroyed.

We should be so close to God, as close as our underwear is to our body, and listen to whatever He tells us to do.

THROW IT OUT

 When my kids were little, we would play a game of ‘Hot Potato’ where we would stand in a circle, and I would toss a beach ball to one of them. As I threw the ball, I would make a statement, “You are kind,” and they had to grab the ball, discern if it was a truth or lie, and then throw it back to me, declaring which one it was.

“You are wanted” – TRUTH

“You are ugly” – LIE

“You belong” – TRUTH

“You are stupid at math” – LIE (math might not be their strong suit, but they are not stupid).

I was teaching them that not every thought they have, or words spoken over them are the truth. In fact, some of them are downright LIES and can be thrown out. Little did I know back then just how profoundly it would shape them as they got older. They are so quick to grab the thought, discern it (generally because it feels awful), and then toss it back out. Jesus tells us to take every thought captive (2 Corinthians 10:5)! Grab a ball today and teach your children to discern what is a LIE and what is TRUTH.

INTERRUPTED SLEEP

I posted this revelation and discovered 1,000’s of people have been affected. Praise God many have also experienced a sudden shift after praying.

How many of you, or those in your family, have had interrupted sleep patterns lately? Like can’t fall asleep, waking up many times throughout the night or just a foreign restlessness around sleep?

As a watchman in families, I am seeing something we must rise up in and take authority over. There is an attack on sleep right now. It comes in the form of oversleeping, a lack of falling asleep or waking up getting interrupted sleep. God has designed our bodies to NEED sleep – deep sleep – and has ordered the world according to work and rest. Even the fields work hard and need a season of rest.

Being sleep-deprived affects one’s mind, body, and spirit. It is like a numbing agent. Rest is part of what keeps us alert, clear-minded, and empowered.

Please discern this accurately and do not assume it is just your body being weird. This is in the spiritual realm and the way to solve it isn’t through natural means but with our authority.

Let’s PRAY – “I command every assignment of the enemy to disrupt my sleep and deep rest to be canceled in the name of Jesus. I declare my body will come into the order of heaven which includes cycles of alertness, productivity, and deep rest. I command the spirit of insomnia off my mind and body in Jesus’ name. I invite the Holy Spirit to come and fill my mind, heart, room, bed, home, and family with Your peace, power, and a clear mind that comes from rest.”

You do not need to put up with being bullied in your sleep. Take authority over the spirit and take back what is yours in the name of Jesus.

Now gather the children and invite them to pray over themselves. Explain that God has given us seasons like winter, spring, summer and fall. What would happen if it was winter all the time? We wouldn’t be able to enjoy swimming in the lake or planting food to eat. What if it was hot all year long? What if it rained 365 days? God, the Creator of the world and our bodies, has given us a rhythm and we are most alive when we follow His design. As a family, walk through each bedroom and pray for deep sleep and rest.