IT’S SO FUN PARTNERING WITH HOLY SPIRIT

IT’S SO FUN PARTNERING WITH HOLY SPIRIT

Way to partner with Holy Spirit, Jessica!!! 

“My six-year-old son just had a birthday and scored big time in the Lego department. Then the new catalog came in the mail, and I felt a check in my spirit about letting him have it as he just started talking about what new sets he wanted. I felt led to take the catalog away and instead focus on gratitude. He was pretty upset, and one morning was acting out. I asked him what was going on, and he said he didn’t understand why he couldn’t have the catalog. On the spot, I just asked Holy Spirit, ‘How do I explain all the dynamics of greed to my son right now?!’ (I naturally, in my own strength, want to lecture on everything, and I’m sure he stops listening not long after I start talking). After asking for help, I just started into a spontaneous parable where the main characters were named ‘Greed’ and ‘Thankfulness.’ Both my boys had their eyes riveted on me the whole time I told the story. They interacted with it, related to it, and were captivated! I never explained the parable… just left it as it was (later realizing that Jesus did this as His main form of teaching all the time!). Since that moment, he hasn’t asked me for the catalog again. It was so fun partnering with Holy Spirit’s ideas!”

WITH THEM, NOT FOR THEM

Stewarding a child’s heart with God needs some sensitivity. When we lived in California, scores of parents would come to me confused why they sold everything to move halfway around the world only to find their child resisting the things of God. Over time, it became apparent that many of them did it FOR their children, the hope of deeper and greater things, but they failed to do it WITH them, which would have allowed them to walk out their journey and taste and see the Lord’s goodness. Ultimately the children were mad at God for taking away their grandparents, friends, favorite stores, and all things familiar. Knowing this, I have been very careful with my child’s heart when I feel God asking us to obey in a BIG way. The moment I started to realize we might not be staying in Colorado (about a month after arriving), I mentioned it to the kids in question form, “What would you think if God was telling us not to stay in Colorado?” and I was allowing them to get used to the idea. We learned how to steward the question together, often talking and processing different options. It allowed us to dream together (Ellie was convinced God was going to send us to Australia). Lauren and Emma were excited and open from the get-go. They have seen God be faithful, and while they love their friends here, they were ready for God’s adventure, their faith was already built that God is good. Ellie does not like not knowing what to expect. She is empowered with information, so her part of the process was learning to trust God in the dark and when her mind can’t see it for herself. She did a great job of working it out, yet once she went to North Carolina with me and saw it for herself, her sail of faith went up, and she was on board. However, my son was different. He hates change and is super loyal, so he doesn’t like leaving people; it is harder for him. He didn’t want to move to California and then didn’t want to leave. He didn’t want to go to Colorado and then didn’t want to leave. I know this about him and attempted to help him process it in stages. We were on day two of our scouting trip, and I could feel a wall in the spirit. It was frustrating. I called a FaceTime family meeting, and it was revealed that Hudson was speaking against the trip. While the girls had their sails of faith up, Hudson had an anchor. We are so connected as a family I could FEEL it 1,000 miles away. I was a little frustrated but knew it was better that I wait to move forward and do it together rather than do it FOR him, or he would blame God for leading me where he didn’t want to go. I finally told him this, “Hudson, I am not asking you to get your heart right to move to North Carolina. I am asking you to process whatever is in the way of being fully surrendered to God so that you are willing to go wherever He leads us.” There is such a difference. He took the time to surrender the things that he was holding onto ABOVE wanting God’s will, and by the time I came home, he met me in the driveway with tears and his blessing to go wherever God was leading us. Doing things FOR our children is kind. Doing things WITH our children allows them to build their faith and trust in God’s goodness.

SHARE YOUR STORY

 Many parents ask me what the best resources for raising children in the faith are. While there are a lot of things we can do to nurture their relationship with God, I firmly believe one of the most significant ways to impact them is merely sharing your own journey with them. I often tell the kids what God is doing in my heart, revealing the things He has spoken to me, or how verses have come alive for me. I am taking what is inside of me and getting it out for them to see, hear, and feel. It is one thing to talk about it; it is another to witness and experience it. This is one of the glorious things about family and living with such a deep connection to those around us. If we get hit with something hard, I make sure the children aren’t just seeing the struggle but also the journey of God showing up in the process. Have you shared your childhood stories about life with/without Jesus and how it has impacted you? Have you told them when and how you first met Jesus? Do they know about your recent revelations and encounters? Your journey with Jesus is powerful – share it!

SHIFTING MINDSETS

You are not the potter; He is. We must shift from the parenting mindset of ‘shaping’ and ‘molding’ our children into something and learn how to partner, call forth, and pull out what God has ALREADY created them to be. Isaiah 64:8.

HOLY SPIRIT IS YOUR FRIEND #1

I had two significant encounters that changed my relationship with Holy Spirit. Here is the first one.

When I became a solo parent, there was a wide and deep gamut of emotions to process. I would go into my closet and let it out. I could cry (even yell), and the kids would not be able to hear me. It was my safe place. My mentor gave me two books to read, and I would wake up early and go into my closet. Something began to yearn deep within me for more of Him. The former was great, but I was dying for more. It felt like survival. I had to have more of Him. I did not want the wacky, weird, even embarrassing Spirit that made my heart feel so unsafe and uncomfortable, but I was growing in my unquenchable hunger for Him, and at that point, my hunger was forcing my guard down. Hungry people do whatever it takes to be fed, even break down mental barriers that have been erected to keep them ‘safe.’ Within six months of losing my husband, my dad died, and two weeks later, my stepdad died. I was in full-blown grief over the significant men in my life and, at the same time, developed a headache that would not cease. It felt like a constant brain freeze from eating something cold too fast; nothing would reduce the pulsating pain. This went on for three months straight. People kept telling me it was just stress due to my profound grief, but deep down, I knew I had better coping skills than that. Despite the pain, I managed to drive the kids from CO to MN by myself for my dad’s funeral, and weeks later, I even took them to the mountain for our annual family getaway, but all I could do was lay on the bunk bed, unable to move. Finally, one night, I told the kids to lie down on Mommy’s floor and sleep. I could not help them get their PJs on or brush their teeth. I put my head on the pillow that night, fully confident I would die of my brain blowing up. The pain was unbearable. Hours later, I was rushed by a friend to the ER, where they discovered my carotid artery was torn. It was nothing short of a miracle that I held together for three long months walking around with a ripped artery. I was transferred to ICU and was told a simple sneeze could severely tear the artery completely. I was at high risk for a stroke or aneurysm. I spent a very scary few weeks maneuvering through healing for both my broken body and heart. I was still so sick and weak after being released from the hospital that my friends thought it best to keep the kids for a bit longer to give me time to heal. I was assigned a home health nurse because I kept fainting and passing out whenever I would stand up. One afternoon, I sat dazed on the couch, wanting to get up to make myself something to eat, but too weak to move. It was hours before my nurse arrived, yet I knew I risked passing out again if I got up. I was trapped in my body. While my heart was being stretched beyond its capacity with grief, my body was also being pushed to the limits. I was overwhelmed by my state and so desperately wanted to be healed. I missed my children (I had not been with them for over a month) and felt isolation so deep it was paralyzing. I was extremely sick and powerless to take care of my basic needs. It is hard to describe the weakness of my mind, body, and spirit at that moment. It felt like death.

Out of nowhere, I began to see events unfold. This was not just in my mind; it was as if it was really happening, and I was watching it like a movie. I saw a girl on a hospital bed and emergency workers rushing around her. They were running and racing the hospital gurney down the hall (again, I was watching this as if they were really doing it). There was seriousness and panic in the air. The girl on the hospital bed was me, and suddenly they stopped and placed a white sheet over her. I cannot fully explain what happened next, but I stood up and dropped to my knees. It was like my face could not get low enough to the ground, and words began to flow out of my mouth. It was as if I was speaking from the depth of my toes. I did not understand what I was saying, yet I knew I was saying something. It was forceful, and while I was aware I could stop it at any time and felt ‘in control,’ it was so powerful and moved without my effort or help that I did not want to interrupt it. It went on for a good five minutes, and then it was like it was over. I sat up stunned, with my face and hair completely soaked. I was a bit bewildered by what I had just experienced but realized I felt physically different. I felt like me again and felt strong for the first time in months. I had absolutely no grid for what just happened. I called my mentor, fully convinced I may have just lost my mind. She began to laugh and said with much joy, “Oh Lisa, you just had your first vision and spoke in a prayer language. Lisa, that was Holy Spirit!!!!” I believe the vision was Holy Spirit alerting me that a spirit of death was coming to me, and He gave me a language to pray against it. My mind did not understand it, but my spirit did. That encounter left me speechless for months. Was that the odd, wacky, and uncomfortable Spirit I saw touching others? Suddenly to have my own experience changed everything. I had to have more of Him. My hunger became almost excruciating to steward. My biggest prayer from that moment on was, “More, Lord, MORE.” Holy Spirit knew my journey and knew why I was so leery of Him, yet He also knew my deepest desire could only be filled and satisfied by Him. He knew I had a calling on my life that would be to introduce scores of people around the globe to Him, but I first had to experience Him, and He knew it had to happen in a way that came through my need, not my intellectual knowledge as that was shut down to Him.

P.S. I wept writing that. I cannot imagine my life without Holy Spirit. I think of the pages and pages and pages of testimonies of ways He has shown up, revealed truth, parented the kids, opened doors, brought me comfort, healing, and joy, and been there for me. What about you? Are you stuck in the place of being hungry for more of Him but leery of Holy Spirit? Do you need an encounter with Him that reveals who He really is? Cry out and tell Him. It’s okay to acknowledge your weariness, concern, and doubt. Confess your trust and faith in Him, even when you do not have it all figured out yet. More Lord, MORE! 

I LOVE HOLY SPIRIT

I love Holy Spirit – like crazy, crazy love Him. But we didn’t start out that way. In fact, we have come a long way to get here. I was raised in the church and loved Jesus, but I was never introduced to Holy Spirit as a person. Years later, my mom was dying of cancer and went to a known faith healer. She came back glowing from her experience. She was so convinced of her experience that she stopped taking medication. I later woke up from being in a coma for three months to the news that she had died. A deep-seated judgment came over me against faith healers and the charismatic movement. I seethed in anger, blaming Him for taking my mom. I once found a worship tape from this man and ripped out the ribbon in disgust. I spent 15 years pursuing God passionately while rejecting Holy Spirit. It wasn’t really that I didn’t like the Spirit of God. It was that I adamantly did not like the people who fell into the charismatic camp and ‘went after’ the things of the Spirit. It bothered me. I felt uncomfortable. I didn’t understand it. And more so, I concluded it didn’t work because my mom still died. Underneath my resentment was a deep sadness that, despite her attempts to get healed, it didn’t work, and I was left motherless. God, in His mercy, brought me into a season of such deep hunger. I was consumed with the need for more of Him. It is impossible to embrace all the Father has for us without also embracing Holy Spirit. I had to forgive this man for my judgments against him, and suddenly the Lord started showing me how precious and sweet it was that my mom pioneered with Holy Spirit and had a massive encounter with Him before she passed. Judgments towards the things we don’t yet understand blind our ability to receive!

THERE IS MORE!

Take a moment and picture how incredible it would be to be in Hawaii. No, seriously. Stop right now and think about a trip to paradise. The mere thought of the ocean mist, bright sun, and warm sand – sounds like heaven. Now, picture yourself on the balcony of the high-rise hotel on the beach. Pretty cool, huh? What if you were to walk down to the sandy beach with a relaxing book and sit under the sun umbrella? How about strolling up and down the shoreline, flirting with the cool waves against your warm toes? Better yet, picture yourself knee-deep and enjoying the waves splashing against your body. Swimming out deeper and jumping in the waves is an experience like no other. If you venture out just a little further, you can snorkel and see some of the most fantastic fish swimming. Still, does the wonder of the ocean end there? No! There is even more! When you learn how to surrender to the mercy of an oxygen tank, you can stay immersed under the water for quite some time and enjoy the outstanding, breathtaking beauty that is not available for those seated in the safety of their hotel balcony. While the mere thought of being in Hawaii right now is a good one, God wants us to know that there is MORE of Himself waiting to be discovered, and these depths in God far outweigh any beauty we may find on earthly soil. The only person to ever reach the vast depth of the Father was Jesus. For the rest of us, we can stay on the beautiful yet comfortable, confined balcony or allow the Spirit to draw us deeper and deeper. No matter where you are at right now, know there is MORE! The goal isn’t to be air-dropped into the middle of the sea and claim that we have arrived. Doing so ill-equipped would be not only dangerous but also foolish. The goal is the JOURNEY! God finishes and completes our faith, and it is our job to allow Him to lead us one step at a time. Philippians 1:6 is your anchor! 

Now, link this analogy to parenting: Can you picture how drastically different our parenting will be based on where we position ourselves? Those on the balcony will have a different parenting mindset than those who parent from the ocean’s depth. 

Through the different seasons of your life. Are you gradually moving deeper and deeper, or are you having continued visits between the same few safe and familiar locations?

HOLY SPIRIT’S HELP

Over the years, I have gone after making sure the kids know the following safety boundaries:

I share this often because I think it is VITAL. When my children sin/disobey/get out from under my instruction, 100% of the time Holy Spirit gives them a check or speaks to them. I want to teach them to obey HIM more than obeying me. When they were little and would hit, I would come to them and say, “How does your tummy feel?” and would help them to see that ‘bad’ feeling is Holy Spirit telling them that hitting their sibling is not good for them.

This generation NEEDS the leading of the Holy Spirit to maneuver through their world. Because we have already laid the foundation of these boundaries, when my children want to venture out into the world, I simply ask Jesus first and make sure I am feeling peace. We talk about the specific safeguards, and I send them out the door with confidence that Jesus has them, AND should anything come their way, they are prepared and empowered to handle it.

DON’T MISS THE MOVE OF GOD IN YOUR HOME

Children need us to parent, lead, guide, direct, and discipline their bodies and emotions because they are small and aren’t fully mature yet. HOWEVER, the Holy Spirit that lives inside them is the same size as Billy Graham’s, Mother Teresa’s, yours and Jesus’. Holy Spirit is to be respected, honored, and heard. God has A LOT of things to share with us through those with little hands and feet. So don’t dismiss what God wants to teach you just because it comes in small packages!

PARENTING TIP

Teach and practice in the time of peace so that they can use it in their time of need.

YOU ARE THE LEADER

A mom taking our online JOURNEY class shared this:

“I put some worship music on. My daughter and I laid down with our eyes closed and just soaked in God’s word. After about 5 minutes, she got fidgety. I got her settled in again for about a few more minutes and asked her, ‘So did God tell you anything?’ My mistake; she got upset.”

This is where most parents back off and conclude it doesn’t work or their child isn’t responding. But I encourage parents to continue to be the spiritual leader of their home and KEEP GOING. Five minutes to a child is like 45 minutes to an adult. When she was done – she was done – that’s okay. Build upon it next time. Praise her for doing it this time. Kids get fidgety, and it doesn’t always mean they aren’t paying attention. It can mean they have some pent-up wiggles that need a release. A parent’s response to fidgeting can pull them out of experiencing God and into feeling pressure to perform or do something. Be sensitive with how to respond to a child when they are learning how to encounter the Father. Praise her for doing it at all! Tell her how the Father feels about her spending time with Him (if you don’t know – ask Him). A while later, come to her and lovingly ask, “Do you remember when we were listening to the worship music? Why did that upset you when I asked you what Jesus said?” Listen to what she is saying, as she will give you clues as to what she was experiencing. I would keep going and do it again. If she isn’t interested, then YOU do it and allow her to feel the atmosphere of when you are encountering Jesus. Invite her again… and again. But please do not allow her experience to shut you down as the spiritual leader of your home.