IS GOD TRANSITIONING YOU TO MOVE?

IS GOD TRANSITIONING YOU TO MOVE?

There is a big difference between moving and transitioning. I see scores of people called by God to move into new locations in this season, and I believe He is RE-positioning many in the Body of Christ for His purposes. Over the years, I have watched people leave their community and struggle through the turbulence of entry into their new homes. I have often coached people to ask a small group of friends to commit to walking them through the transition for weeks or even months to come, like stakes in a tree until the tree can stand on its own. Now that we have walked through our own journey of transitioning, I wanted to add a few more gems that have helped us leave behind precious communities. Make a list of what you will need to leave behind and what is yours. You will have to leave things behind and the more you can identify what that is, grieve it and let it go, the easier it will be. Make a list of what is yours. You get to take many things with you, and it is important to realize that certain things are yours to carry everywhere you go. 

When we left Redding, we determined that things like seeking His presence, worshiping, praying for the sick, certain relationships, hunger for God, adventures with Him, etc., were ours and things we get to take with us. The more you are aware of it ahead of time, the easier it will be to hold onto them. Conflict or friction sharpens us to become more like Him and is bound to happen in community. Make sure you ask the Lord if there is anyone you need to forgive and work that out in your heart before you depart, so you don’t carry that with you. Furthermore, ask Jesus if you need to make things right with anyone before you depart, so they don’t have to carry that with them. It is healthy to end well. Someone told me once we begin our journey to go to the city limits, get out, and literally shake the dust off. This is not a negative act but one that says, “I leave behind what is behind and press on towards what is before me.” We did this at 4 in the morning with our U-Haul; it was a powerful prophetic act. I could feel a shift in my spirit. The whole physical journey (drive) home was deep and rich. I allowed my mind to flow with memories, thoughts, and testimonies. I cried, felt uncomfortable and messy, yet by the time I arrived, I felt like I had drained so much of my process I was able to embrace the new. The other thing that surprised me was that I felt this strange oppression with former things when we arrived. I kept resisting but felt like I was managing it and not walking in freedom. Finally, someone who also transitioned years before shared that there are OLD GARMENTS of who you were before when you lived there.  The minute she said that, I was able to shake it off and walk in who I am today, not who I was before. Very powerful. 

Do not let old garments and identities attempt to lure you back. Community is built by intentionality. Do not wait for people to embrace you. Even though you are the new kid in town, be the leader in creating connections, community, and building relationships. These points have been anchors for me as we continue to process our journey into new territory.

SCALES ON THEIR EYES

Have you ever said, “PEOPLE ARE SO BLIND”? Raise your hand. How many people have read something on social media and thought, “They are crazy. How can they be so blind?” How many of you have seen the war of words with people attempting to change someone by proving they are wrong? STOP this! It only furthers the insanity. Here’s why! The Bible says if someone cannot see the truth, pray that the scales of their eyes would be removed. They aren’t trying NOT to see in many cases. They simply have scales on their eyes, making them blind. Speaking to their intellect and getting into a debate is not how God tells us to respond. We are to pray for them to have eyes to see. Give it a try. Instead of being the social media police telling people why they are wrong, try praying for God to remove the scales from their eyes. Trust me, GOD bringing revelation to someone is where real transformation occurs. Psalm 119:18 – “If you have eyes to see, pray for their eyesight to be as clear as yours. Open my eyes to see the wonderful truths in your instructions.” 

We should be praying this over ourselves often too. “Jesus, open my eyes so that I may see as You see.”

HOLY SPIRIT, WASH MY MOUTH!

Somewhere along the lines of parenting, advice became the concept of putting soap in a child’s mouth when they spoke unedifying words. As someone who spoke my mind often, I was one of them. It was common in our household to see bars of Dial soap with teeth marks in them. Lord have mercy was this parenting tool from the pit of hell. It did little to ‘clean my mouth’ and instead built up resentment and offense. But the principle of cleaning our mouths is Biblical.

Ephesians 4:29 – “Let no unwholesome word come out of your mouth, but if there is any good word for edification according to the need of the moment, say that, so that it will give grace to those who hear.”

Some of us have become so foul in our speech towards ourselves, our children, and strangers that it has left a stench in the nose of the Father. We need to grab the bubble of Jesus’ blood and ask Him to cleanse our mouths of all unrighteousness. Gather the family and have a fun time washing your hands, seeing who can make the most bubbles. Have fun, let joy break out. Then have them sit in the family room and read Ephesians 4:29. Talk about what it means and what unwholesome speech looks like (which includes tones and attitudes). Together ask, “Jesus, would You please show me when I have allowed unwholesome words to leave my lips?” Share what He reveals, and then as a family, ask Him for forgiveness, “Jesus, I confess that I _____. Will You please forgive me?” and then wait for His reply.

In the days ahead, be sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit to be quick to clean up any unwholesome speech. Your children may need to role-play certain situations in learning how to be upset, mad, or disappointed and yet not sin with their words.

TEEN BOYS

Moms of teen boys – this is for YOU! I have been crying out for keys with my son in this new season, and I believe the Lord was showing me some new strategies. I could not believe my ears when my friend began to share the same keys God showed her. I asked her to share in her own words. I believe this is a massive KEY for moms with teen boys. 

“I am learning that my perception of connection with my fourteen-year-old son is not my son’s idea of connection. As a mom who parallels the earthly role of the Holy Spirit, I often emulate my role to that of the Holy Spirit – to teach and impart wisdom. And because I love communication and heart processes, I would frequently suggest to my Justin that we can read a book or listen to a podcast together and talk about them. On my end, I can see such meaningful fruit and growth for both of us and bring us closer at the same time. But to my son, that was not connection; I picked that up from his uninterested body language and the frustrated sigh. In fact, I think it made us more distant because I missed the mark in connecting what he desired in our relationship. One day I asked him how he feels connected in our relationship, and he shared that he loves quality time with me, like going out on a date for sweet treats. I cringe as I write this because I am a crunchy mama who loves to feed my kids healthy food. So going out for sweet treats is the last thing I would want to do with my son as a form of connection. But since understanding how my son feels connected to me, we have gone on several dessert dates, and every time his love tank gets filled, we have deeper heart-to-heart conversations. I am learning to meet my son where he is at – to talk/teach less and listen and ‘be’ with him more. Thankfully, he still enjoys snuggling with me, and often when I am on the couch, he sits next to me and puts his head on my shoulder. And we just sit there together. Sometimes we say nothing to each other, and I caress his hair and give him a quick massage. Also, learning to be a learner of things that excite my son has brought us closer. For example, he is a basketball player, so watching a basketball game with him, asking questions about the players/plays, and allowing him to ‘teach’ me and reposition our roles is so healthy as he individuates and develops into his independent self at this age. The process of adjusting to this transition has been so hard at times as I learn to let go and readjust my parenting style to meet him in his teenage development stage.”

CONVERSATIONS WITH OUR CREATOR

Hopefully by now you have worked through and settled the question if God wants to speak to you. Faith is an important ingredient in our relationship with our Father. In fact, Hebrews 11:6 says that it is impossible to please God without faith! Ponder for a moment what life would be like if you went mute and had to try to teach, train, and love on your children without words. Seriously, think about how many times a day you use your words to guide your children to teach and train them, encourage them, cheer them on and help them. How often do you use your words to lavish love all over them and tell them how precious and beautiful they are to you? Now, how many times a day do you let your Father speak to you? Stop for a moment and ask yourself.

Why not spend the next hour with your children and tell them you are all going to play a game. NO TALKING. Each person has to communicate what they want to say without using words. Too many believers have limited their relationship to God with the written Word (which is very important), but He wants us to relate to Him, hear Him, feel His love, and experience Him. I liken the difference to wives whose husbands are overseas. While they may exchange beautiful love letters, it is not the same as the wife whose husband is there every night holding her, kissing her, and protecting her. The latter is the kind of love Jesus wants to have with us. We all know no marriage would be healthy or survive without communication. That is how personal God wants our relationship with Him to be. How could anyone find that level of intimacy with someone without talking, listening, and responding to each other? I have often heard people say that they believed God loved them in the “He loves the whole wide world” sense but had never fully understood how much He loved THEM personally until they heard Him speaking to them (John 10:27; Revelations 3:20). The purpose of the cross wasn’t only for forgiveness but also to grant us a relationship with God. God paid a pretty big price to offer us a relationship with Him. Do we not really believe that He wants to communicate with us (John 14:6)? We often pray, fast, believe, declare, hope, meditate, quote Scriptures, seek medical help, strive, ask others to pray, do it on our own strength and lean on our own understanding, but have we simply just asked Him?

I recently heard that people who hear God’s voice (and seek Him) are successful people. I agree – God is all-knowing all the time, and desires to share His answers with us, but we need to ask and then be quiet for a moment and listen to His response. Proverbs 25:2 says, “It is God’s privilege to conceal things, and the king’s privilege to discover it.” The reason why the Creator of the universe would concern Himself with speaking to us is for one reason alone – He loves us (Romans 5:8)! Many of us have been bruised by life circumstances, past relationships, or parents who parented out of their own wounds which can make it hard for us to grasp the depth and width of God’s love for us (Ephesians 3:8). But that’s the whole point of the Good News – we are LOVED! Radically wanted and loved in a way no human ever has and with a depth so deep we would never be able to consume it all. A proper response to His love is hunger – hunger for MORE of Him! Some of the greatest encounters with God are when we get to a place of such holy dissatisfaction with the reality there is MORE of Him and cry out for it. While we have all of God available to us when we first believe there will always be more of Him to discover, explore, experience, and encounter – always! How hungry are you for Him? Hungry people do what it takes, go great distances and pay the cost to get food. Spiritual hunger is a good thing. Matthew 5:6 says, “Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled.”

How hungry are you? 

CULTIVATING GRATITUDE

Gather the kids and talk about the things most dear to your heart. Ask them what is one thing they couldn’t live without. Spend time thanking Jesus for giving it to you.

THE SOLDER, ATHLETE, AND FARMER

Gather the family in the family room and have the children read 2 Timothy 2:1-7. The more you allow them to participate in things like reading, the more engaged they will be in the lesson. Then, on a piece of paper or whiteboard, write out the different attributes of the soldier, athlete, and farmer. What types of character or skill sets does each of them require? What makes them unique? Think about how tired the soldier must get at times, how the athlete does what it takes regardless of how they feel, or how the farmer labors hard, not knowing if the sun or rain will appear. Read verse 7 and spend some time responding. Think over these three illustrations, and may the Lord help you to understand how they apply to you.

PHYSICAL TOUCH

We all need touch, but for those who have the language of touch, it is super easy to fill their tank! 

Here are some creative ways to speak their language: **Put your hand on their shoulder when speaking to them. **Give them a two-minute back rub when putting them to bed. **Start their day with a long embrace. **Hug them every time you leave/return home. **Hold their hand while walking. **Hold them when they are upset. **High-five those successes. **Create a special handshake. **Cuddle with them before bedtime. **Let them snuggle with you while watching a movie. **When driving reach back and hold their hand. **Sit next to them when eating out. **Hold their head when you hug them. **Give them random kisses on the forehead. **Hold them while reading a book. **Tickle their knee. **Play with their hair. 

Just because you have teens does not mean they have outgrown their language. Teens need physical touch, too.

IMMATURE WORLD CHANGERS

Children might be world changers in training, but they still have childlike immaturity that needs to be cultivated so that they can endure the assignments God wants to give them to change the world around them for a lifetime. Character is a stone in their foundation that must be laid in childhood.

Character Counts is a downloadable digital resource that we created to give parents the How-To in equipping their children with godly character. We provide you with fun and engaging activities to do with your child to empower good character.

Character Training SOAR Magazine – Let the Children Fly

TRUTH IN – TRUTH OUT

I woke early one morning with resolve in my spirit that my prayers needed to be deeper. Sometimes we knock on a door and wait for an answer, and other times we bang and bang until someone answers. I felt in my spirit the latter. Like a rubber band being pulled in two different directions, the atmosphere has so much resistance. Can anyone else feel it? Tension and pulling. I grabbed my Bible and searched deep in Psalms for verses that resonated with what I was sensing. I prayed passionately over every verse and declared with boldness His truth. Thirty minutes in, something shifted like an airplane going through turbulence before it found smooth skies. 

Friends, we are not to manage this season by just enduring. We are to keep on pressing into Him. I encourage you to gather your family, grab your Bible and search for verses in Psalms. Have children draw out the verse, create artwork with His truth, declare it out loud, write it in chalk on your driveway, make a song with the verse, etc. The point is to get His truth IN you so that it can come OUT of you.

LET HIM PARENT YOU

How many of you would love to have someone there to encourage you, guide you, give you specific wisdom in your situation and help coach you through life? We all do, right? The WORD is your parent, mentor, and guide. We can proactively read the Word – read for the sake of spending time with Him without an agenda AND/OR We can read the Word based on what we are going through. Pinpoint the issue; conflict, anger, strife, fear, provision, etc., and then spend time researching what the Word has to say about it. I can’t tell you how powerful, validating, and encouraging this has been for me over the years. The counsel of man is fantastic in its rightful place, but some issues and situations are reserved for God’s opinion, counsel, and guidance. God has given us an outline of how to respond to a situation and conduct our lives SO THAT it goes well with us. Let Him lead and teach you through His Word.