IMPOSTER SYNDROME

IMPOSTER SYNDROME

  • Atmospheres, Authority

IMPOSTER SYNDROME

As a new believer, I was a part of a church that I loved. I loved the leadership, community, and movement. But when we began to worship, I would be plagued with thoughts of how the pastor didn’t want me there. I battled it in my mind thinking I had some hidden insecurity. It was so bad one week that I went to ask a mentor for prayer. In the middle of worship, she brought me to the head pastor and said, “Lisa is struggling with thoughts that you don’t want her here.” I felt a little exposed and silly as he assured me there was room for me. I was able to receive that, but I had to work hard to maintain it. I began to associate going to that church with the incredible challenge it was just to feel ‘fine.’ Years later, I endured the same thing nearly every single week at another church. I hated those thoughts as that was not how I felt as I walked in, yet the moment the worship started, so did my thoughts of not being wanted in that house. I felt like I was a wedding crasher showing up at a church not knowing the bride or groom and like I had no right to be there. It wasn’t until years later I discovered that this is a real demonic spirit called ‘imposter syndrome’ which whispers to you that you are phony, do not belong where you are, and, at any moment, someone is going to call you out for not really belonging there. It tells you that you have no right to be called, included, or seen. It is hard to feel connected, safe, and secure with this lying spirit. Why did I battle this at these two locations and not others? Because the spirit was present in that church. Someone needed to discern it, and then someone in authority needed to deal with it. Yes, I had authority over it speaking to me, but it had a legal right in the house to speak to those present and needed to be dealt with on a corporate level. While it was not ‘in’ me, but rather around me, due to my lack of understanding, I was plagued with wondering what was wrong with me. And all be it, so did scores of others.

If you are plagued with these thoughts in your community, check how you are feeling before you walk in. If you walk in feeling like you don’t belong, it could be a soul issue that needs some additional healing from your previous experiences. However, if you are fine walking in and then suddenly attacked with these thoughts, I suggest you find someone who understands the spiritual realm, and you share with them what you are discerning. Your church leadership has authority over this and can pray against it.

FLIP IT

There was a shift happening in the spiritual realm and God woke me the next morning with this increased fire to pray. When I sat down to pray, I asked Him what to pray for, and He showed me something very specific. I feel like there is a call to increase your prayers but ASK HIM what to pray for. We are each on assignment from Heaven, so let Him lead your prayers. Gather the kids and ask, “Jesus, how do You want me to pray this morning?”

So many in the Body are feeling grief, sadness, and heaviness. This is not all you and a part of something greater. Pay attention and let God lead you in the midst of it. 

**The video stops abruptly at the end, and I chose not to re-do it. Grief in the Body – YouTube

ANTICHRIST DREAM

I had a dream that felt like a town rodeo/carnival event. I signed the kids and me up to serve in the kitchen. There were four leaders who were influential in the community who came out to serve (like when you see a governor working in the soup kitchen). They were dressed in unusual costumes (like the Viking guy at the capital riots). The show was about to start, and we were finding our seats in the stands. I looked around and saw many people I knew, all excited about the sense of community and big events. One of the leaders who came to serve said it was time to get into this car (there was a parade to kick off the event). I suddenly felt really uneasy and told Ellie to act like she was really sick. Ushers were trying to get us to stay and not leave. I was adamant that I had to get my sick child home. As we drove through a barricade of workers who were keeping people from leaving, I had to pass through another barricade of police officers. I knew it would be risky to do so as I would be vulnerable for arrest, but I knew I had the authority not to be there and had to get out as quickly as I could. The kids asked me why I was so upset and why we had to go. I told them that the man who came to serve said he had to get into the car marked ‘the christ’ and lead the way. Everyone was roaring over being able to see ‘the christ,’ but I knew it was the antichrist, and his charm memorized everyone. There was no way I could sit in the stands and watch him being ushered in. I had to flee with everything inside of me and keep my children from being exposed to him. I woke up and was so grieved in my spirit how many people were caught up in the moment, unable to discern for themselves. I was grieved by how his charm seduced many. I was grieved by how many felt intimidated by the ushers and barricades, feeling powerless to walk in their free will. The number one thing I pray for in this hour is an increase of discernment.

JOY IS ESSENTIAL IN THIS HOUR

If you are having waves of stress from all the uncertainties in the world, can you imagine how children feel? JOY is essential in this hour!!!!!

JOHN 10:10

I have a friend whose teen daughter is fighting for her life after harming herself. I have another friend whose teen daughter ran away, and they don’t know where she is. I have another friend with a teen son addicted to porn. Another friend has a daughter in a psych ward. The one thing they all have in common is that they all passionately love Jesus. The battle for our children is real. We MUST equip our children with heaven’s tools to deal with hurts, lies, and offenses. As believers, we may experience the beginning of John 10:10, but we get to camp out in the last part! “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”

THE POWER OF WORSHIP

When we sneeze, we release something into the atmosphere. Our words shape the world around us; like sneezing, we release something healthy or unhealthy: life or death – blessing or curse. Worship is a powerful ‘sneeze’ into the atmosphere that pushes away the darkness and brings life to dry places. I invite you to participate in this hour of worship – play worship music in your home for 24 hours. Open our windows and let it change the atmosphere around you. Let’s corporately saturate every molecule of this earth with the edification of our Defender, our Rescuer, and our Victor because we know the truth and how this spiritual warfare will end. People have always underestimated the power of worship, but the enemy does not! Will you use your home as an instrument of releasing His Kingdom at this hour?

DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR YOUR CHILD

Do not feel sorry for your child that they are born and enduring this season. God knew it when He knit them together and put inside of them all that they needed to not just survive but THRIVE and create the change around them. As someone once said to me, which planted the seeds of Let the Children Fly, “Lisa, pull yourself up by your bootstraps and equip your children to deal with their reality.” We must not render our children ineffective in this season of change and challenge by feeling sorry for them but equip them for such a time as this.

TOOLS OF WARFARE

So many of you precious people are feeling worn out, discouraged, and in battle. May I encourage you? The enemy’s assignment is to wear you out (Daniel 7:25). But God has given us the tools of warfare. Now more than ever, we must know and apply our armor daily. Ephesians 6:10-17 outlines God’s protective covering over your mind, body, and spirit. But it is conditional – you must pick it up. Spend some time going over your armor, and then GET IT ON! This is not the season to do life on your own strength. In fact, Ephesians 6:10 says our power must come from His strength, not our own. You will overcome, but you have to do it His way!

PROTECTED

This is so important to understand that the enemy stands on the sidelines of your journey, watching God draw you near to Him and you responding. He has NO legal right to interfere, so he stands on the side whispering that we should be afraid that God will ask too much of us, that we can’t really trust Him, etc., in hopes that someone will stop, pause and proceed with caution out of FEAR, Rebuke that fear in Jesus’ name and tell it to hush! Fear (especially fear of God in this way) does not lead you. Holy Spirit does, and He always leads you into ALL Truth. God leads you (John 16:13), and His plans for you are GOOD (Jeremiah 29:11).

DEPRESSION VS. OPPRESSION

Do you feel depressed? Years ago, I plopped down on the chair and began to tell my mentor that I was depressed. I felt heavy. My mind was like a thick fog, and my heart felt like it was carrying around a bag of rocks. Little brought me joy and being motivated to do basic daily chores was hard. We began to ask Jesus about what was going on in my heart, and within a few minutes, I said, “Oh, the depression is gone.” She replied, “That is because you weren’t depressed.” Confused by her reply, I asked for understanding. She began to tell me that depression is rooted in our body and has to do with a chemical imbalance. Depression is real and affects many. But she went on to say that OPPRESSION is the pressure the enemy puts on us that feels, looks, and sounds like depression but is rooted in the spiritual realm. Oppression feels like a python snake squeezing you. True chemical imbalance depression is cured by medication to regulate the hormones in the brain. But oppression is cured by taking authority in the spiritual realm, aligning our thoughts with His, and declaring truth. When we do those things, the oppression flees. If you are feeling a heavy weight of ‘depression,’ try moving into a place of intentional worship, declaring out loud, commanding it to leave in Jesus’ name, and worshiping! If you feel a shift, it was oppression. This goes for adults and children!