I DECLARE

I DECLARE

I left my four-month-old twins at home and put my newly pregnant self together for my first moms night out in nearly a year. I was excited to join my mom’s group for a night of carefree laughs. Everything was going great until halfway through our meal when one mom mentioned co-sleeping. Nearly every single mom believed in co-sleeping, and the comments were becoming the law vs. an option. Things were being said like, “If you don’t co-sleep, you are harming their emotional well-being,” and “I feel sorry for the kids whose parents are too selfish to share their bed.” I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. I felt shame, judged, and inadequate as a new mother. It did not take long for MY reality to sink back in. I had two four-month-old babies, a husband who woke up at 4:00 AM for work, I was pregnant again with a growing belly, and we had a queen-sized bed. NO! Co-sleeping was not for us. I had to intentionally draw a line in the sand, push back their ‘wisdom,’ and be at peace with what was best for our family. I wished that painful experience with my peers was a rare moment, but I have found in parenting that this is a normal occurrence. 

Picture a dad injecting his son with a shot every morning. When asked WHY he was doing it, he replied, “Oh, I was at the hospital the other day. I noticed other parents doing it, so I wanted to be a good dad and give it to my son too.” How absurd, right? What keeps one child alive would actually harm another. We have got to get a hold of this in our parenting in order to parent with their Creator and what He is doing in their lives. No two families are a cookie-cutter of God’s design. We are all unique expressions of what He is doing on earth. The mom raising a missionary does not have the same job as the mom raising the next President of the United States of America. We are all bringing children up in the way they should go according to His plan and the assignment He has for them. We need to break the agreement that our families should fit in, look like everyone else, and the pressure to mold them according to someone else’s expectations. You stand before Him alone and give an account of how well you stewarded what He has given you (not what others expected of you).

I encourage you to pray this out loud, “Jesus, I confess that I have attempted to shape my child into someone else’s image. I ask for Your forgiveness for having my eyes on the fear and pressure of man instead of You. Do You forgive me?” Make sure you are not just asking for forgiveness but receiving it too. Make these declarations out loud over yourself: 

I DECLARE I am more than enough for my family. 

I DECLARE I do not need to parent like anyone else. 

I DECLARE my child does not need to conform to anyone else’s box. 

I DECLARE God knows what He is doing with my child. 

I DECLARE I will always know what to do because Christ lives inside of me. I DECLARE partnering with God in my parenting is the best way to raise my child.

HEALING WHAT WAS STOLEN

I have shared about my powerful time ministering to the moms at the rescue mission in California. A friend messaged me saying she wished I could come minister to her girls in Colorado. I just happened to have had a trip planned and an evening free so I took Lauren and Emma to minister with me. What a glorious night of freedom for these sweet mamas. I honor them for the hell they have been through and for the ways God is redeeming, restoring, healing and repaying for all that has been stolen. If you want to see God move, sit with those who truly need Him.

LET HIM LEAD!

I was able to score cheap tickets to Florida and decided I would take the kids for some R&R and splashing in the ocean before school started the following week. The following morning I woke at 3 am pondering our trip. While it ‘looked’ fun, I had no joy. I got out of bed and began to process why going to Florida was not bringing any joy whatsoever. The joy turned into NO PEACE. It wasn’t fear, but simply no peace or joy on it. The Kingdom is righteousness, peace, and joy; I have used these as my pillars to lead me. I canceled the trip.  And then I see this… A double hurricane isn’t my idea of joy either, God. Thanks for leading me so well.

Shhhhhhh! LISTEN! HE KNOWS HOW TO LEAD HIS SHEEP.

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU

Emma had a bit of a rough day, and I knew her heart felt tenderized. The following morning, I made an effort to really see her and gave her a long good morning hug. I began to call out the truth about who she was. When I said the words, “There is nothing wrong with you,” she let out a big sigh and relaxed in my arms. I realized what she needed the most was to be affirmed that SHAME (something is wrong with me) is a liar, and she had permission to ignore it despite the evidence making it feel very true.

EMMA’S STORY

Emma came bursting through my bedroom door when she was five and announced, “Mommy, I have to have Jesus in my heart right now!” She said her Sunday school told her all about Jesus, and she needed to do this. I said, “Oh, sweetie, that is the most amazing thing. How about you come to me first thing in the morning if this is something you really want to do?” I wanted to be sure this was her heart or something she felt like she was ‘supposed’ to do. She said, “Mom, NO. I can’t wait that long,” and so we prayed, accepting Jesus in her heart. I told her that Jesus tells us once we have accepted Him to go tell others and asked who she wanted to tell. She jumped off my lap in a flash, and about five minutes later, her twin sister, Lauren, came into my room, asking to accept Jesus. We celebrate their spiritual birthday each year, thanking God for adopting both of them.

DON’T GIVE UP HOPE!

I received this from a mom who took our online class: “DON’T GIVE UP HOPE!!! If you’d have told me two days ago, that my teen daughter would talk to me till 1 am in the morning, I’d have said it was impossible. If you’d told me that my defiant, self-harming, oppositional girl would also hold me tight and hug me for almost a full minute, I’d have cried, longing for you to be right. If you’d told me that this self-proclaimed atheist girl would tell me that she is ‘giving God another shot,’ I’d have wept, thinking that day would never come. YES… all those things happened last night. I was the hopeless person on this FB page all the time. Some of you have supported me so much through this hard journey and remember my girl. I just HAD to take time to write here that THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED!!! She is still proceeding with caution, and I am parenting her with SOOO much grace and mercy, and love. DON’T GIVE UP HOPE!!!”

IDENTIFYING HEART SPLINTERS

A mom shares: “Even though I wish I had known this years ago, I’m so grateful and excited to have this awareness and understanding now of how to identify and go after heart splinters personally and help my kids understand how to address them on their own. In the short time of learning to identify a hurt, lie, or offense, our family has already begun to experience freedom! We will be practicing together and trusting Jesus to give us understanding and teach us even more as we grow!”

FEAR KNOCKED

My son got an invitation to go on a friend’s boat. I had peace and said yes. However, several hours into it, I realized it was the same lake a sweet friend’s husband passed away at. We also had a recent story in the news of a nine-year-old that drowned in the same location. Fear was knocking loudly, and I began to rehearse all these different scenarios and thoughts in my mind. Suddenly I realized nothing had happened, and yet I was reacting with my emotions as if it had. I identified it as the spirit of fear, told it where it could go, and slammed the door. Just because fear knocks does not mean I need to answer the door!

TOUCHPOINT

Our brokenness becomes bittersweet when it is the catalyst for crying out for more of Him.

VICTIM TO EMPOWERED

One of the best statements spoken over me was from a business mentor who heard me lamenting about how hard the process was, and she said, “Well, that doesn’t sound like a very empowering statement. You can do better than that.” It woke something up in me to create solutions, not complaints. Feel the pain and then put my energy towards solutions. This has been something I have tried to empower my children in too. First, validating their frustration and then helping them to move from victim to empowered in choices to care for their needs, heart, and situation.

KINGDOM PARENTING

“I received revelation about how to respond to my oldest son who challenges me the most. He opened his car window all the way, which caused the whole interior of the car to vibrate, and everyone got upset. Normally, I would yell at him, shut the window, and lock it. But this morning, I stopped myself, waited, and listened. Holy Spirit said he was angry that I turned off his TV show when it was time to leave. The cool thing is that conversation turned into another conversation about God. It was amazing! The car ride was so fun and peaceful, the atmosphere completely shifted back to His presence and peace, and at the end of our adventure, out of the blue, my son said that was the best day he ever had! Thank you, Lisa. This course has started to affect my response to my children, which, as you see, has really blessed us.”