“I am a single mother to a precious 7-year-old. She has no memory of her dad and me being together. While she loves spending more time with him, the tearing apart every time has been very real and hard. She cannot understand why she can’t have us both at the same time and is constantly missing the other one. Lisa gave me the tools to walk my daughter through inner healing. One particularly hard night, we walked through the steps Lisa had given me, both of us. My crying, hurting little girl gave her wounds, fears, and anger to Jesus, and He gave her peace, joy, and love in return. I gave Jesus mine as well and returned with the same. We giggled and laughed and felt so healed! She told her class about it the next day because Jesus met her in her pain and took it away. It was beautiful!”
GIVE YOUR WOUNDS TO JESUS
It is hard to describe the cry of my heart for families to be awakened and aligned with Him in this critical season. I am expecting God to do big things in your family as you say YES to Him. I feel a rising in my spirit as families MARCH FORTH and take background that has been lost, stolen, or asleep in their family.
My spiritual daughter shared how God is leading her family in this season: “A new thing our family has started doing is asking, ‘Do you need a 20-second hug?’ And teaching them how to ask for one. A 20-second hug can… increase levels of oxytocin (the love hormone), reduce blood pressure and cortisol (the stress hormone), increase happiness, lower stress, improve relationships, and connection.”
Do you like the girl in the mirror? Do you wish you had a mentor who could cheer you on? Do you feel alone in a room full of people? Do you always feel this distance in your heart? Do you often feel like something is wrong? If yes, I invite you to join the two-week online adventure of being seen, heard, and valued.
You can register here: Moms & Dads – ONLINE CLASS – Let the Children Fly
Orphan parents cannot raise children in the palace. They must know who they are first, and God is always eager to welcome us.
A gal shared this in class: “Wow, Lisa! God is indeed using this mentoring class to uproot some lies and hurts that were hidden in my heart that I wasn’t even aware of. Your words are so powerful, and Holy Spirit is using them to do an extreme makeover in my heart. I read your post while waiting for my daughter during her gymnastic class. Holy Spirit grabbed my heart so strongly that I had to leave the room and go outside for a good cry. I realized I had an orphan spirit because I lacked my earthly father’s affirmation. I was trying so hard to earn my Heavenly Father’s approval with my performance and constantly striving for excellence. I couldn’t contain my tears; I was crying out to Abba Father, for I knew He wanted to heal my heart and fill me with His love and grace to the overflow. I asked Father how He would do it because I saw a big giant hole in my heart, and it felt impossible to be cured. But Papa whispered the word ‘beautiful’ over and over to me. ‘I am making something beautiful in your heart.’ I may not understand it, but I believe that today He started a process of healing in my heart. And I say ‘YES’ and ‘AMEN’ to what He is doing in me.”
I walked through some deep betrayal years ago and wrestled it deeply with God. I had this mental picture of Jesus holding both of us on His lap, and it made me mad. This person brought me so much turmoil and pain, and I didn’t like the fact Jesus loved them so much (this isn’t my true heart, but it was a moment in my processing the pain). I finally called my mentor because it was making my heart feel unsafe with God. How in the world could He love someone who has brought so much pain? Her response was brilliant and literally shifted something so deep within me. She said, “Lisa, you do not fully understand the picture. God loves this person just as much as He does you because He created them, but God is only on the side of righteousness, and this person isn’t choosing righteousness.” It wasn’t a matter of whose side God was on as much as it was who was on His side. It was like my hands opened, and I dropped whatever offense, pain, or fight I was holding onto and clung to righteousness. It altered decisions and outcomes dramatically.
When Emma was five, she came to me sobbing that she hated her outfit. I encouraged her to pick out something else. She did, and that, too, produced an ocean of tears. She set off to find something else, but the flood of tears continued. At this point, I was getting a little annoyed and frustrated. We were already super late for Thanksgiving dinner at a friend’s house, and clothes were simply a non-issue in my home up until that point. Why did they matter so much now? By the fifth outfit, I was about to give her a good lecture on, “naked you came, naked you will leave,” and I could feel my blood pressure rising. I heard her tears coming back up the stairs, and suddenly Holy Spirit whispered, “Ask her WHY.” I sat her down and asked why she hated her clothes. She stated immediately that it was because she wasn’t pretty enough (lie). But we had to keep asking questions. WHY did she believe she wasn’t pretty enough? She then revealed the painful splinter: “Because my daddy doesn’t love me.” Satan had whispered to her that he didn’t like her because she wasn’t pretty enough and that if only she could find the right outfit, she would be pretty enough to be loved. Imagine if the splinter had not been dealt with that day. Fast forward several years to when she is fifteen. Her unresolved need for love drives her to dress for boys’ attention. What about when she is twenty-five and married and causes a great amount of debt due to her obsession with shopping in an attempt to feel good about herself? The hurts, lies, and offenses are there to steal, kill, and destroy our relationships with God, ourselves, and others. I believe that the enemy was seeking to plant a lie deep in Emma that day that would reap a harvest for a lifetime through the pain with her father. I explained that the voice she heard was not Jesus but His enemy. Because kids have free will, I always ask, “Would you like to tell that lie to leave?” It empowers rather than controls them. She said she wanted to get rid of the lie, so I led her through a prayer that looked like this: “Jesus, I confess I believed the lie that I am not pretty enough to be loved.” “Jesus, I forgive my dad for not making me feel like a princess.” “Jesus, where were You when I got my feelings hurt?” “Jesus, how do You feel about me?” She sat there with her eyes closed and her head bowed and suddenly got the biggest smile on her face. She looked up and said with excitement, “Mom! I wore this beautiful dress, and my hair was like a ballerina’s. I was dancing with Jesus, and He said I was HIS princess!” While that was indeed a sweet moment, what is so awesome about this story is that God used it all for good when the enemy came to harm and hurt. To this day, years later, that girl KNOWS she is Jesus’ princess!
This is the core purpose of Let the Children Fly. A mom taking our online JOURNEY class wrote: “I wish I’d been affirmed and taught in this way as a child. I think it would’ve made all the difference in my life, knowing and asserting my authority over darkness instead of worrying about it and avoiding it.” It is not too late for you to come and learn!
I have said for years, “Parents, do the heart work so that your children don’t have to clean up the mess.” This mom is willing to do the hard work for the benefit of her grandchildren. Breathtaking.
“Jesus’ flashlight (tool) was a breakthrough moment for us. The concept of heart splinters helped my children to see what was going on. Their delight in knowing Jesus wants to take it out so they could be healed was tangible and beautiful. I do feel like it is quite the growth curve for me based on the parenting that was passed on to me, but I am committed to doing the work. I envision what their lives as adults will look like as we address these things in childhood, and should they become parents themselves someday, the jump start they will have to navigate this with their children.”
Pray this powerful prayer and allow Holy Spirit to restore connection with your child. “Holy Spirit, I give You permission to be my child’s Defender and Advocate. Would You please reveal to me where I have been wrong, caused a hurt or made a mess so that I can make it right?” If He showed you something, go low and ask for forgiveness.
Teaching your child to confess their sin robs the enemy of his desire to wrap them in shame. Humility is taught, not to condemn but to FREE us from the sins of our flesh. It looks like this: There is conflict, and you ask, “Sweetie, what did you do wrong?” They tell you their part (confession), and then you help them ask for forgiveness. “Jesus, I hurt my brother. Would You please forgive me?” If they honestly can’t tell you what they did wrong, then YOU haven’t done your part as a parent to teach them what right living (righteousness) looks like in that situation. Teach and empower them in times of peace what right living looks like. Forgiveness isn’t a blank credit card for our sins. It is a GIFT that needs to be acknowledged, honored, and intentionally received. When children mess up, they carry the guilt, which can easily become shameful if not dealt with. Helping them confess brings peace to their heart.