DESIRES FULFILLED

DESIRES FULFILLED

  • Godhead Parenting, Kingdom Parenting

DESIRES FULFILLED

My son was invited to play airsoft guns with a friend’s husband. He was super excited and talked about it non-stop. Yet the morning of, he was really unkind to his sisters, wasn’t listening, or following through on things I had asked of him. It was a continued battle all morning. Finally, I told him he could not go. The moment I shut it down I heard God say, “Removing his heart’s desire is not the key to his heart.” I instantly took back my words and have pondered this a great deal since. It is the goodness of God that leads us to repentance, not withholding, punishing, or communicating we have to be ‘good enough’ to have our desires met. The key to the testimony was discovering what was really going on and not just seeing his bad behavior. While my son’s choices that morning could have been from some form of rebellion in his heart, I believe it stemmed from his profound excitement to bond with an adult male over the activity that he loves the most. He lives with 3 girls and a mom 24/7 and has a natural longing/desire in his heart for male connection. He talked about it non-stop all week long. The morning of he was growing impatient for the big moment to arrive. He was like a child the night before Christmas. He is still a child and lacked the maturity to steward his impatience well. I am all for discipline, correction, and training, and yet there are times we care so much about righting their wrong and fail to see the bigger picture of their heart. The Kingdom of God does not ‘punish’ for age-appropriate immaturity. When I first said he couldn’t go his entire body sunk and it pierced his heart. If my goal was ‘punishment’ I did it. But the moment I said, “God just told me that I was wrong to take away your deep desire to go,” he broke down in tears. We talked about his excitement and impatience and how he behaved that morning. He was fully repentant and said he was sorry to his sisters and me.

Here is the glorious part – then I got to connect the dots for him that Father God sees his heart and wants to fulfill those desires. Do I REALLY want to shut my son down for not being able to control his utter excitement over getting this deepest desire fulfilled? That is where partnering with my son’s Creator is so key – we don’t always know what is going on in their hearts, but He does. There is a time to discipline, a time to say ‘no’ and there is a time to look deeper at the bigger picture!

WE ALL NEED JESUS!

It always surprises me when I hear people talk about me as if I have mastered this concept of parenting with Jesus. Let me be the first to tell you I have great experience partnering with Jesus to raise children up to 16 years. A day after that, I need Him just as much today as I did yesterday. It was never meant to be a maturity that we reach to begin walking confidently on our own but a constant dependence upon Him. I blow it, make mistakes, feel confused, am overwhelmed, doubt myself, wonder if I am enough, don’t know what to do, feel clueless about what my children need, etc. It keeps me dependent, humble, and seeking Him just as much today as I did years ago when I first discovered He was my Husband. Get your eyes off the goal of ‘arriving’ and settle into the fact you will always need Him in your parenting, and that, my friend, is the best position to be in.

OWN IT!

I have always wanted my twin daughters to share a room, but God told me to separate them and give them their own space. We had so much fun talking about designing their new spaces. Lauren turned her closet into a desk area, and it was gorgeous. Emma walked into Lauren’s room and saw the hours of work, and said, “Oh man, your room looks better than mine,” She went back to her room and undid all of her work, trying to copy what Lauren did with her space. It didn’t work! She was frustrated and struggling a bit. I realized that was such a prophetic word for what God is doing in them. I told her that Lauren’s space was perfect for her, but that Emma needed to own hers and that copying or comparing herself to her twin would only leave her feeling short, frustrated, and defeated. She quickly turned her room back the way she first had it and LOVED it. Isn’t that true in life? We can’t slap someone else’s success on us and assume it fits. Thank You, Jesus, for the way You are parenting with me and aligning their hearts daily to the path YOU have for them.

JESUS PRAYS FOR YOU

I love asking Jesus questions. And I love hearing what He has to say. Recently someone invited me to ask, “Jesus, what are You praying for me today?” And the concept messed with me a bit. We are in a significant season, and we will step into all that we have been contending for in the past season. It’s a powerful moment for me personally, as well as Let the Children Fly. The resistance, warfare, and battle in the spiritual realm has been real – very real. I asked Jesus what He was praying for me today, and I saw a proud parent watching their child play in a school band recital. The joy on the Father’s face was more beautiful than the music. But then the scene changed, and I saw a father and child with backpacks on as they began to climb a mountain – together. I got emotional as I realized the Lord was saying He has been praying for me to learn how to do things WITH Him (the climb) and not just FOR Him (the recital). That is exactly what He has taught me in this season and what brought me to this place of profound breakthrough. We can only go alone so far, but when we learn how to walk with Him in our journey, He takes us further, deeper, and higher.

GOING AFTER LOVE

Going after the power of God alone leads to fear and intimidation. Going after the love of God is what makes you powerful.

STOP TRIMMING THE HEDGE!

I had an encounter with Jesus, where He showed me a wall. I could not for the life of me discern whether this was a good or negative wall. Was it keeping things in or preventing something from going in? The lack of clarity perplexed me. I heard Jesus say the wall needed to come down, so I asked what tool I should use (because even in the natural, anytime you remove something, you use a specific tool based on the wall). I saw a hedge trimmer that was so logical and obvious, but it felt wrong. I asked again and saw the trimmers, yet this overwhelming feeling of ‘this isn’t right’ came over me.

The kids were all splashing in the pool when I got on my raft and asked them to give me a moment so I could continue to process this revelation with the Lord. I needed greater clarity, but I KNEW He was showing me something. Something caught my eye, and finally, I removed my sunglasses and sat on my raft to look. He was highlighting the shrub hedge on the other side of the pool when I heard Him say, “Lisa, if your job was to remove that hedge (wall), would you use a hedge trimmer?” No way, it would not only take forever, but every time I would trim it down, the branches would grow back as pruning is a form of growth. I would wrap a chain around the base and yank it out with my car roots and all. BINGO!

God was showing me that I was laboring (well, I might add) to trim the hedge (wall) when He was actually calling me to YANK IT OUT BY THE ROOT. Oh, the flood of fruit that came with this revelation. What if we REBUKED the spirit of strife behind it instead of just resolving conflict? What if instead of feeling drained, we sat in His PRESENCE to be refreshed? What if instead of battling fear, we used our AUTHORITY against it? What if instead of coming under intimidation, we DECLARED 2 Timothy 1:7 (and believed it)? What if instead of shadowboxing the enemy, we WORSHIPED the Lord? What if, instead of feeling dread every morning, we spoke to the spirit behind it and commanded it to FLEE? What if instead of taking aspirin daily for the pain, we HEALED the body? What if instead of managing attitudes, we ENCOUNTERED the Father’s love? What if instead of stewarding the lack of peace, we COMMANDED the chaos to flee? What if instead of continually disciplining a child, we TAUGHT them who they are in Christ?

You do not always have to deal with the ‘fruit’ of new branches. God has given us tools and power in Jesus’ name to deal with the root and have it removed. What about you? What negative cycle do you repeat over and over in your home? Are you continually trimming the branches? Is it time to YANK IT OUT once and for all?

LEADING FROM THE FATHER’S HEART

As I watched the worship team enter the stage one week, I was captivated by this vision. I saw a leader in pre-service prayer ask point-blank questions regarding their purity. He had those who raised their hand in guilt leave and go into another room. I was confident that the leader would declare since those who had admitted sin had left the room, those remaining would lead worship, but the scene changed when the leader excused them to go and entered the room where the ‘guilty ones’ were. He offered a prayer of repentance and an invitation to get right with the Lord in that area. There was great weeping and true repentance. He then said, “Great, you are now ready to lead us in worship.” Legalism and the spirit of religion say only the perfect can take the stage. The Father’s heart says to lead them to Him, and in that place, they are made fit to serve.

BUNDLES OF JOY

One day, I was super-duper stressed and couldn’t get the kids in their rooms fast enough so that I could have a date with Jesus. I saw the kids as a hindrance to my very serious issues that needed to be resolved. The first thing I heard God say to me was this, “Lisa, what you need now is JOY, and I have given you four bundles of it. You push them away when you are stressed, but what you really need is MORE of what they carry.” Gulp! Out of pure obedience, I called them all up and announced that we would be playing a family game. My heart was so heavy, and finally, my daughter said that she could tell I didn’t really want to be there. I apologized and just told her that I needed “Heaven’s joy to come down on me.” My son (then 6) stood up on his chair, motioned his arms outstretched towards heaven, and said, “Joy, come NOW,” and then threw his hands towards me. He did this in a child-like chanting manner over and over. I was about to scold him for standing on that chair, which is against our house rules! Right before my mouth opened, my daughter, Ellie (then 4), got up on her chair and joined him. Argh! This was not how I wanted to deal with my heavy burden. Then my other daughter got up. I was about to come unglued. My religious spirit was highly offended, and this was way too much child-like foolishness for my serious state; PLUS, they were breaking the rules by standing on the furniture!!! When my last daughter arose to join them, I heard the Spirit say, “Join them!” Oh, come on! There was no way this heavy-hearted mama was going to get up and partner with such foolishness. A millisecond later, I was on my chair with my hands outstretched for heaven, and before I could pull it down, such JOY splashed all over me like a tsunami. I was overcome with peaceful joy and laughter. It went on for nearly fifteen minutes. I was so tuckered out after that, and my belly ached from laughter.

Oh, sweet Jesus, thank You for teaching me that worry and fret do not add an ounce of victory to what YOU have already done for me. Thank You for teaching me that Your Kingdom is righteous, full of PEACE and JOY, and if I truly want Your will to be done, I get to go play and rest while You take care of all the details.

SHIFTING YOUR FOCUS

Learning to shift my focus is what really helps me in times of earthly stress. Say it is a money issue. I do not focus on the need for money to come in (which would seem the proper response). Instead, I focus on His goodness as my Husband. When I need something, my eyes and faith aren’t on the end result, but on HIM. Instead of praying, “Jesus, I need x-amount of money by Thursday. Please send the money.” I focus on, pray, and declare, “God, YOU alone are MY Provider.” See the difference? One keeps our eyes on the lack/need, while the other keeps our eyes on Him. The latter is the place of FAITH and REST. God whispered to me years ago to “enroll them” (meaning my kids at a Christian school in CA). That is all He said. Nine months of fear and doubt followed. Worry was on one side, and God’s gentle whisper on the other – I had to choose which one I was going to partner with. After I sold our house in Colorado, said my goodbyes, and drove four children across the country, the school called to say there wasn’t any room for them and asked what my plan B was. At that moment, my entire world could have crashed. I thought about the question and realized there was NO plan B because I wasn’t striving to make plans happen. I only had what God told me. My eyes weren’t on them getting into the school or not; my eyes were on GOD’S GOODNESS. He told me what to do, I did it, and whatever He had for us would be good because He is a good Father, Husband, and Provider. A week later, the school called back to say there was room for the children. Of course, there was; God told me to enroll them. Do we have a plan B when circumstances squeeze us? Either God is good, or He isn’t. Either He is our Provider, or He isn’t. Either He is love, or He isn’t. We can’t pick and choose when we want to take Him off the shelf and when we want to put Him back on it.

UNITY IN THE FAMILY UNIT

The whole job of a parent is to teach! I know some of you are saying “duh,” but some of you might be like me and have not realized just how early it starts and what all needs to be taught! Holy Spirit-led parenting is rocking my world. He is flooding us with the tools of heaven that not only makes sense to the kids but also hits me right where I need it! There is not a one-and-done answer or one magic class that can teach us as parents. It is all hands-on, and in the moment, and THAT is why we NEED Him!!

Hear what this mom had to share: “One day, I brought the kids out to the trampoline. We talked about Jesus being the light and how light casts out darkness. I was using examples and reading the Scripture when my son said something along the lines of, ‘So you’re saying when there’s a gap between us, more darkness comes in?’ YES!!!! So the image below popped into my mind. I thought of the game ‘Red rover, red rover, bring _____ right over.’ We had two big guys in our class growing up. As we played this game in the gym, they sent over a smaller guy! This guy came running as hard and fast as he could, and he got LAID OUT! I’m pretty sure he got a concussion! It is the perfect imagery of just how strong we are as a family UNIT when we are UNITED!!!!! The enemy doesn’t have a chance! So I told the story as the kids held hands and then asked them to separate. How easy was it for the enemy to get into their circle and cause a big fuss when they were not a unit?”

I’m telling you. If you are ready to throw in the towel, DON’T DO IT. Get desperate. Desperate people get stuff done! Seek first His kingdom, and HE WILL ANSWER. Our families hold the answer, not the problem.