CONNECTION OVER BUSYNESS

CONNECTION OVER BUSYNESS

  • Connection, JOURNEY

CONNECTION OVER BUSYNESS

Testimony from a mom: “I have a memory of my mom in the kitchen, having her back turned against us and doing dishes. My dad, brother, and I were in the living room chatting, eating, and watching TV. I realized God was showing me a lack of connection with my mom. My mom was a busy homeowner taking care of two young kids while caring for a huge extended family. I always yearned for some time with her (later on, I learned that my love language is quality time). God showed me that He wants me to connect with my children by spending time with them. The sad truth is that I spend a lot of time cooking, cleaning, and just taking care of a family. All the chores weigh me down, and I can’t seem to find time for them. God is shining a big flashlight in my heart and my past to let me know that He wants me to put down my chores and spend time with my children (my older one’s love language is also quality time). Thank You, Jesus, for showing me this.”

BREAK AGREEMENT WITH FEAR

I am sharing a dialogue between myself and a mom in our JOURNEY class. 

A mom shared: “I definitely desire to have a deeper relationship with the Lord; however, I sense fear as a barrier. Fear of losing my children. I almost lost my daughter when she was an infant. I remember standing in that hospital room telling Him I’m ok with what He decides to do (heal or take her). He healed her, and she was considered a miracle! But ever since, I have had a fear of losing her again.”

My response: Thank you for your real and vulnerable post. I am so sorry you had to walk through that as a mom. I want to expose the fear in operation and then help you resolve it. When you walked through that experience with your daughter, it happened to you physically, emotionally, and spiritually (mind, body, spirit). God healed her, and she lived so that the immediate trauma was physically over. I am sure there is a vast amount of emotions that you had to process and are still processing ongoing due to her needs. However, I want you to see that experience also happened to you spiritually. It WAS a scary event for you, as it would be for any mother. There was a real threat of loss, and that was horrifying. Your fear of losing your children is a lingering spirit of fear from that event. The event is over, and your daughter lived, but the spirit of fear has remained. We could say it this way – that event opened the door to the spirit of fear, and the door is still open. We need to close the door and renounce partnering with it. We want to resolve it because in the spiritual realm, we welcome and invite in what we fear, and fear has no hold on you as a Daughter. It is there specifically to steal, kill, and destroy your peace and trust in God. I encourage you to spend some intentional time walking through this. 

Here are some steps to coach you, but let Holy Spirit guide you. Pray out loud, “Fear, I see you. You are exposed. I no longer partner with you over the fear of losing a child. You are a liar and not my friend, companion, or guide. I break agreement with the lie that torments my mama’s heart. I break the agreement that God is not in control. I break the agreement that I need to live in worry and fear over their physical well-being. Fear, I command you to leave now in Jesus’ name. You may not speak to my mind, the things I see, the things I hear, my nervous system, or my memories. Holy Spirit, I invite You to come and fill my mind, eyes, body, and memories with Your presence and Your peace, in Jesus’ name.” 

I also encourage you to picture taking each child in your hands and handing them over to God. He is their Father and needs to be the head of their lives as any other way will put pressure and worry on you as their mom that you are not wired to carry. Surrender their well-being, number of days, and safety to Him. As you do this with each child, then ask, “Father God, if keeping them alive and safe is Your job responsibility, then what is my responsibility?” Let Him teach you how to parent your children together, each knowing what you are responsible for and what you aren’t responsible for.

FAMILIES IMPACTED

These messages from parents taking our JOURNEY class cause me to weep in gratitude over His goodness. 

“Lisa, your daughter’s story of protection because of a relationship with Jesus has probably impacted me most and made me want to learn ALL I can from your teaching to equip my kids. My husband & I both are really appreciating the practical applications you are giving & I felt a definite shift in our mindset and spirit today!”

GET THOSE EMOTIONS OUT!

My heart is heavy for the parents facing hard things with their children. I want to encourage you with the following: #1. ANGER – Be mad, let it out, and process those emotions. Scream in a pillow, journal, beat the sandbag, go for a hike, vent to a friend – whatever you have to do to GET THOSE EMOTIONS OUT! You cannot afford to carry the weight of those emotions with you. Get them out so you can let them go. #2. GRIEF – Many of you are grieving. Grieving for your family, your child’s heart, the plans for the year, and your ability to juggle it all. This is real and must be acknowledged. Grab your journal and begin, “God, I am so sad that…” #3. HOPE – It is hard to be anchored in hope if you carry around a lump in your throat, are ready to explode, or feel like a victim. Processing your emotions and heart will help you move into HOPE. Hope is anchored in THE truth, not the facts our circumstances scream at us. Declare the TRUTH! God has not left you. You have what it takes to not only survive but thrive. You will know what to do (because He lives inside of you). 

God has keys and strategies for your situation. He works all things out for good, He sees your world, and He cares. He has a solution – ask Him! It is going to be okay. Your child is going to be okay. YOU are going to be okay! 

PARENTING GOAL

Children who are full of fear, anxiety, and emotional hurt, who believe a lie or feel afraid, can act that out in mean, rude, and inappropriate ways. Just because a child does certain things doesn’t mean the solution is always discipline. Sometimes the solution is a hug, alone time with you, a special date, a positive word, or to be seen. God’s GOODNESS leads us to repentance because He looks beyond our messes and sees what our heart really needs. Perfect behavior should never be the goal in parenting – their heart should be!

FEAR, I SEE YOU

I loved receiving this testimony!!! Crawl into the world of this little boy and how his mom responded to his real heart. 

“Hi Lisa, I’m not sure you’ll get this, I know you receive a lot of messages but I just finished your JOURNEY course and had to share something that happened today. My three-year-old has been struggling in Sunday school for the last month or so. When I signed him in he immediately cried and clung to me. I told the teacher I would keep him for worship and try again in a bit. We went in and started singing and he just hugged me and snuggled through two songs. I brought it up that I would take him after singing and he started fussing again. The band started singing Jeremy Camp “Same Power” right then and it hit me – your authority lesson! I asked him if he wanted to not be afraid and then I said, ‘Fear, I see you,’ and commanded it to leave and then ushered in peace. After the song I asked if he was ready and he was a completely different kid!! He walked to the room holding my hand and didn’t look back after saying bye to me. I am embarrassed to say I’m shocked, I shouldn’t be, because this is our God, but I just can’t recall ever feeling this powerful before in my parenting. I’m just so excited to have done this class and learn things I can use to help my kids through life! Thank you, thank you!!!”

PEACE VS. FREEDOM

Our goal as church leaders and parents should not be peace. Instead, our goal as believers has to be FREEDOM from what causes the patterns of chaos in the first place. It is the freedom that naturally produces peace. But to go after peace without freedom is nothing short of behavior modification, legalism, and denying the power of the Cross.

KNOWING THE WHY

Love this! A mom in our JOURNEY class shares:

“I took this teaching on being spiritually clean and sat my six-year-old and four-year-old down to talk through why we only watch certain shows, and if we realize a show isn’t good for our eyes or our hearts, we choose a different show. I drew lots of rectangles on a chalkboard and then put a tiny circle in amongst the rectangles. I asked them what shapes they saw, and they said ‘rectangles’ then I asked if they were sure there were no other shapes. They both said, ‘just rectangles.’ After another minute of looking, my six-year-old saw the tiny circle, and then we got to talk about how it’s really difficult to see good and lovely things (the circle) if we’re covering our chalkboards with yucky things (the rectangles). It was great! They totally got it and were able to settle into knowing the why behind what we’re doing again.”