COMPASSION & VALIDATION

COMPASSION & VALIDATION

  • Atmospheres, Authority

COMPASSION & VALIDATION

How many of your children, especially younger ones, are having unusual meltdowns and not wanting to be away from you? While this can be rooted in many things, including normal development, I am hearing so many parents reporting this issue, and I think it has more to do with the effects of C-19. First, there is so much in the atmosphere. While we are getting stronger and more resilient, I sometimes walk into a store and feel so gripped with anxiety (which is not coming from me). I leave and feel better. This is being released from others. Those in charge of your children (teachers, friends, in-laws, sitters, church, etc.) are releasing their emotions, and children can pick up on it. Keep going after walking in authority over the fear and releasing peace. Second, children hear that C-19 causes death and their minds naturally worry if that will happen to them or their parents. When you have to leave, assure them you are okay, that you will return, and they are safe. When a child has a meltdown, they only need TWO things – compassion and validation. CV medicine, as I like to call it. Then after they feel safe again and are calmed back down, talk about ways to empower them and increase their capacity to handle it differently the next time.

CONTROL-BASED PARENTING

Giving up control-based parenting does not mean giving up your God-given authority. It does not mean the child is in control, nor does it mean they get to make the decisions.

IT ISN’T YOU

There are two ways to teach a child how to swim – on dry land, where you explain everything to their mind, OR by putting them in the water and giving them step-by-step instructions on how to survive. 

God is inviting MANY into the pool right now and wants to teach you how to use spiritual tools that have not yet been used before. It can be scary for a small child to hold their breath underwater for the first time, but once they trust their instructor’s instructions, they can master the skill and enjoy playing in the water. God wants to teach His children how to master the weapons of heaven so that they can play in His Kingdom on earth.

How many of you have felt a strange heaviness or unique feelings that you know are not you? After posting about what I was feeling in the atmosphere (this constant sense like I was in big trouble. Yet I knew it wasn’t me personally), many of you have messaged me saying, “Oh, I thought I was going crazy until I read your post.” No, no, no, you are not going crazy. God does not allow us to see, hear, or feel things in the spiritual realm just to crush us. Yes, some things are indeed big and heavy, but the purpose of having discernment is for Him to use you on earth. 

So first, if you have been feeling foreign and unique things that you know isn’t you (coming from unprocessed pain, unforgiveness, or offense), pinpoint what it is that you are feeling/sensing. This heaviness feels like _____. Second, ask, “Jesus, thank You for giving me spiritual eyes to see and ears to hear. What do You want me to do in response to this?” Third, OBEY whatever He tells you. He is the Commander of heaven and earth and knows how to lead His people. Your job is not to have it all figured out and understand the big picture. Your responsibility is to obey.

WORDS MATTER

John 10:10 shares that the enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy, while Jesus came to overcome and bring life. Your WORDS decide which side you want to camp in.

DON’T CURSE YOURSELF

From the mouths of babes. A mom was troubled by her daughter’s ongoing anxiety and worry. Every night she would declare how awful she is going to sleep, and it would put her into a bad cycle with so much angst and worry in her voice. I taught her how to teach her daughter to take authority over it and this is what her daughter said, “I like that, filling me with peace. I’m going to sleep well tonight.” 

EXPOSURE TO FEAR

Sometimes we have been exposed to things that need to be dealt with. The number one response from parents worldwide is childhood ‘reoccurring nightmares.’ The nightmares stemmed from kids being exposed to ghost stories, scary movies that mom and dad thought were cool, shows about violence, news shows that walk through murder, rape, or abuse stories, the COPS show, etc. I want to advocate that even if your child isn’t watching these shows, you can still be inviting fear into your home when you are entertained by what the enemy does! Parents, you are the spiritual gatekeeper in your home, and what you allow in will greatly impact your child. Which Kingdom are you partnering with? The greater point is that children need to be intentionally TAUGHT tools to use when fear comes. They do not need to be harassed day and night endlessly with fear. Jesus trumps fear… ALWAYS!

DO NOT ABDICATE YOUR THRONE

 In January 1936, the King of England died. Following royal protocol, his eldest son assumed the throne, becoming King Edward the Eighth. But in December of that same year, only months into his reign, King Edward stunned the nation when he formally abdicated the country’s throne and the many benefits of royalty. What is especially alarming is the phrasing of the official decree, which ended in these haunting words: “I, Edward the Eighth … renounce the Throne for Myself and for My descendants.” Imagine. With one stroke of the pen, this man sealed his fate and the fate of his children and grandchildren for generations into the future.

As parents, we, too, occupy a throne in the sense that God has given us a position of authority in our kids’ lives. We mustn’t renounce that influence. Children don’t need us to be their friends – someone telling them what they want to hear. They need a parent – an authority figure willing to speak the truth into their lives. Of course, we should listen to our children and consider their views carefully, but our kids should not be allowed to run the home. That’s our God-given responsibility. So, take the lesson of King Edward to heart. Abdicating your authority could risk your kids’ future for generations to come. 

AUTHORITY

Ever have those days where you feel hit from all sides and yet do not know why? Ever feel like a python squeezes you to the point you can’t breathe? Or feel like you are in a war without a name? There is the natural realm with our flesh – all things on earth. There is the heavenly realm which is all things in heaven. But there is the spiritual realm that operates between the two. Satan is the ruler of the spiritual realm. (Adam was, but he gave the keys to Satan in the garden). There is more to what we see and hear. There is an atmosphere of things unseen all around us. Have you ever felt so much love in a room or house? Someone is releasing that into the atmosphere, and you are coming into that presence. Have you ever gone somewhere and fear met you at the door? Again, it is an atmosphere that has been released. Jesus has authority over everything (Matt 28:18), and we can change the atmosphere in His name. How do we do this? By discerning what is being released (and not assuming it is just you) and releasing the opposite spirit. Let me say it this way: tell hell to go in Jesus’ name. Invite heaven to come. In today’s age, much fear and doom are being released by people’s words, the news, social media, etc. I have been on active alert to loosen the spirit of fear that is behind it and command it to go. I have been aware that my declarations of hope, life, and peace are crucial in this hour for my own spiritual health and those around me. 

Years ago, I felt attacked relentlessly, and it was intense. All I could do was lie on my bed feeling all alone, completely consumed, and like I was sinking deeper and deeper into a pit. Ever been there? I eventually reached a dangerously low place in the pit and realized if I did not fight my way out, I might not get out. I knew from experience that this was never a good place to be. I texted a handful of prayer warriors who I knew would bombard the heavenlies on my behalf. I called a friend with whom I could be real and messy. I talked to my mentor and bared all with her. Then, the revelation breakthrough came: I HAVE AUTHORITY OVER THIS! A few days later, I was watching the news and heard of a major story that confirmed what I was feeling/sensing that day. I realized at that moment that I was feeling it for a reason. I became hungry not only to discern what I was sensing in the atmosphere but to be an active participant in releasing heaven in those situations. What you speak, declare, and pray is powerful and has the power to change situations, circumstances, and outcomes. Proverbs 18:21, James 5:16, Matthew 28:18. 

HeartWork – Let’s walk this out. Sit quietly for a moment and take a few breaths. What are you feeling/sensing? Fear? Peace? Joy? Strife? Confusion? Comfort? Love? Discern whether what you are feeling is in heaven. Will we experience that in heaven? If not, then you have authority over it. Searching for a Scripture that backs up His truth can be helpful. Say you were feeling anxious and are led to Philippians 4:6. You can declare, “Anxiety, I loosen you to go now in Jesus’ name. You may not speak to my emotions. I invite Holy Spirit to fill me with His power and love.”

PUT YOUR STAKES IN THE GROUND

Put your stakes in the ground. I kept hearing this phrase over and over. I finally sat down to explore what God was telling me about it. After doing some research on it, I discovered that authority is exercised when we put our stakes in the territory God has given us.

One example I found explained that when Native Americans learned they were going to lose their land, they would put a stake in the ground and tie a rope to someone’s foot making them defend their territory to their death. Their belief was that it was better to die defending your territory than be chased away. I camped out with God for a while on this concept of putting your stake in the ground and felt like our family needed to grab ahold of it more.

We went on a family outing and picked out our stakes from the local home improvement store and then came home and wrote down the things that we will not be moved in. The areas, principles, or convictions that we will not settle for less in. God has given us land to occupy, and we will not shrink back, be moved, or be bullied in this space. We wrote them on our stakes and drove them into the ground (if you can’t find stakes, popsicle sticks or wooden sticks from the craft store work well, too). We put them in the front yard so that each time we leave the house, we are reminded of our territory and not to shrink back from it. 

STOP!

I was once at the prayer house, and the worship song captivated me the moment I walked in. I nestled into my chair, closed my eyes, and felt so engulfed in His presence. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a weed wacker appeared so loud it crowded out the music. The atmosphere shifted in the room. Grrrrr. Grrrrr. Grrrrr. Suddenly it stopped, and again I found that sweet spot with the Lord. Grrrrr. Grrrrr. Grrrrr. Once again, its presence dominated. This went on for several moments. Going from the peace of His presence to the annoying revving of a machine. I was growing agitated when I heard the Lord say, “Get up, open the door, and command that they stop.” I realized at that moment the “Grrrrr” was being used by God to show me something. He continued to say, “There are things crowding out your worship and focus on Me. You have authority over the noise.” Instantly I knew what He meant, and I took authority over the mental noise that I was choosing to listen to.

If your thought life doesn’t produce peace, joy, love, and acceptance, then it is nothing more than a “Grrrrr” in the spirit realm. You have the authority to command it to cease.

THE POWER OF WORSHIP

When we sneeze, we release something into the atmosphere. Our words shape the world around us; like sneezing, we release something healthy or unhealthy: life or death – blessing or curse. Worship is a powerful ‘sneeze’ into the atmosphere that pushes away the darkness and brings life to dry places. I invite you to participate in this hour of worship – play worship music in your home for 24 hours. Open our windows and let it change the atmosphere around you. Let’s corporately saturate every molecule of this earth with the edification of our Defender, our Rescuer, and our Victor because we know the truth and how this spiritual warfare will end. People have always underestimated the power of worship, but the enemy does not! Will you use your home as an instrument of releasing His Kingdom at this hour?