This is a follow-up to my recent post about pornography.
I am getting messages from parents who are confessing this has been a real battle in their home, and they are bringing it into the light and dealing with it but want to know how to close the door for their children. These are great questions and need to be addressed.
“What do you mean ‘open/close the door’?” The Bible tells us not to give the enemy a foothold (Ephesians 4:27). We open the door to him when we have patterns of sin. When the door is open, he now has a legal right to influence, and we know he operates with the goal of stealing, killing, and destroying.
“How can my choices affect my children even if they were never directly exposed to pornography or sexual sin?” While these things are done naturally, there are spirits attached to sex in any form outside of God’s design. When parents are involved in sexual sin, it opens the door for those spirits in the home. Susie doesn’t need to see anything with her eyes in order to be affected by the spirit that was allowed in. Oftentimes for girls, this doesn’t translate into sexual behavior but a profound sense of shame and an attack on her identity as a female. Fathers are to be the covering over the home, and when the door is open, children often feel a sense of lack of security and unprotected. Mothers are to be the sense of comfort and nurture, and children often feel a lack of attachment or connection when the door is opened.
“What is so damaging to children about pornography and sexual sin?” Sex is good – by God’s design. The enemy takes what is pure and righteous and uses it as a weapon to steal, kill, and destroy. The main targets are a child’s gender/sexual identity, sense of worth/value, and protection.
“How do I close the door?” Two things must be done in response to sexual sin – repentance and authority. Repent means admitting your wrongdoing and turning the other direction. I realize sexual sin creates a powerful stronghold for many and can be a journey of getting free, but we can’t ever let sin communicate to us that we have expired Jesus’s blood. If you fall 100 times, there are 101 drops of blood for you. The second is realizing that the behavior attracts and invites the wrong spirits into your home and using your authority to close the door. “Jesus, I confess that I have _____. Do You forgive me?” Don’t just ask for it, receive it.
Once the blood of Jesus covers you (forgiveness), you can operate in your authority. “Sexual spirits, I see you, and you are not welcome in my home. I am forgiven for my sins, and it is by the same blood that I command you to go now. I close the door to you and forbid you from entering this home again. I will not give in to your temptation. You are no longer welcome here and are forbidden from speaking to me.”
Pray over your children specifically. “You may not speak to (child’s name) eyes and the things they see. You may not influence their thoughts and the things they think. You may not influence the words they speak or the words they speak to themselves. I command you to leave this house now in Jesus’ name.”
The Bible says whenever you tell the bad to go, you need to invite the good to come. “Holy Spirit, I invite You to come and fill (child’s name) with Your love, power, and peace over their mind, identity, and relationships. I invite You to stand guard over them and protect them fiercely. Fill them with Your truth and lead them into healthy, vibrant friendships that honor You.”
As the head of your household, declare what your house stands for. “As the head of this house, I decree and declare that this is a home of peace, growth, and love. We operate out of life-giving heart connections. We stand for truth, honor, and purity.”
We are forgiven for our sins and walk in His light.