ABORTION

ABORTION

  • Encouragement, Heart Splinters

ABORTION

Do you remember Pilot Sullenberger (Sully), who landed his plane in the Hudson River, saving the lives of all his 155 passengers? His aircraft lost both engines after flying through a flock of geese. Despite being a hero, the NTSB brought charges against him because he didn’t save the plane. During the trial, they had flight simulators that ‘proved’ he should have turned the plane around after the engines shut down and that he could have successfully landed in LaGuardia. Wisdom from experts created evidence against his choice.

Finally, his voice was heard. He agreed that there may have been a ‘perfect’ outcome, but he gives voice to the fact the simulators could not factor in having the weight of human life in your hands and making a split-second decision that will affect you the rest of your life. After that, all charges were dropped. It is easy to have perfect wisdom when you are clear-minded, but other factors control and impact the outcome when you are in a real-life situation.

I have a hard time taking an ‘in your face’ public stance against abortion, not because I am not pro-life, I AM, but because I SEE the mom, not just the child. I cringe when I see people standing up for the child and, in the meantime pushing the hurt further in the mom. I want to paint a picture to help you understand how a young mother could choose to end her child’s life. The enemy preys on situations that shock our system. The bill that arrived in the mail, a loss of a job, experiencing someone’s rage, the death of a loved one, etc. In these moments, our minds and nervous system are overwhelmed. This is when the enemy comes in and whispers lies that feel true. We partner with lies at that moment because we have ‘evidence’ that the lie is true (even though it is not). When a young girl finds herself pregnant, the shock alone is paralyzing. Many of them are still walking out puberty, where their emotions and thinking aren’t fully developed. The news is like putting a heavy blanket on a young puppy. It is too heavy for them to process and carry. “You aren’t old enough,” “You will ruin your child,” “Your mom will kill you if she finds out,” “People will think you are a whore”, “You will never have a life again,” “You can’t do this,” “The father will never walk this out with you,” “You are all alone,” “You don’t even have a car,” “You will never get a job now that you have a child,” and on and on it goes. Shame kicks in, which causes many to isolate themselves from family and community. They attempt to carry the weight alone and are left with their limited fear-based thinking to create a solution. They are now in extreme emotional isolation. Emotions trigger thoughts, and thoughts trigger emotions. It spirals out of control, and the ‘what if’ game brings torment. Fear races through their minds at the realization they can’t even fully care for themselves yet, much less the burden and responsibility of another child. Remember the scene in Titanic when the water was entering the cabin, and they were sucking the last bit of air out of the corner before the water completely engulfed them? Now picture that person gasping for air with a child attached to them. The inadequacy is paralyzing, and a spirit of fear is in operation.

We have girls in shame, fear, and isolation – all tools of the enemy that gain the legal right to influence. The abortion movement is ‘wisdom’ inspired by the enemy to steal, kill and destroy the next generation. They go under the disguise of ‘helping,’ but it is like burning down the house to kill a spider. It may have removed the ‘problem’ but leaves scars deep inside. When a young mom partners with shame and fear, it is like putting a magnet on herself. The abortion industry is there to ‘save’ them from this situation and also has a magnet attached to it. Both sides attract each other in the spiritual realm. It isn’t the young mom in a rational, clear-minded place walking into the abortion clinic; it is a young mom who is being influenced by the spirit of fear, profound shame, and deep emotional isolation that leads her there. After the abortion, the mental torment ceases, and the dust clears, leaving her to realize what she has just done. She must choose one of two roads – deal with the pain of her reality or push it down so deep it blinds her conscience. Rationalizing in their mind but knowing in their spirit otherwise.

We can demand a ‘perfect’ choice, but unless we understand what is in operation and HOW a young mom can be seduced to end the life inside of her, we will not help them choose otherwise. The battle is not won on the picket line but in the spiritual realm. The enemy’s plan is to use fear, shame, and isolation to lure the young mom into the abortion clinic, where she volunteers to end her child’s life. God’s plan is to use community, love, and acceptance to help the young mom navigate a very challenging situation. This is where true mothers and fathers are needed the most because life is literally dependent upon it.

GOING TO GOD ON YOUR OWN

My kids were all taking turns being upset and offended with each other. I finally called a family meeting to discuss and eventually left the room, giving them instructions to ‘work it out.’ An hour later, I came back to find a greater mess. It was not only unresolved but worse. I told each of them to grab their HEART SPLINTERS book and their journal and go process with the Lord. I told them to ask God to show them what page to read and let Him guide them. I went to check on them and found this: One child was deeply convicted over how mean they had been to her sister for something she did last week. They were holding onto offense. One child was crying, realizing how she had lacked kindness and felt bad for the way she was hurting her sibling. One child said, “God told me to look at page 72,” and it was the very issue they were having with their sibling. Another child said they were punishing their brother because they were mad at their dad for something (profound). 

Parents, I cannot encourage you strongly enough to purchase a copy of HEART SPLINTERS – Resolving Childhood Owies in Childhood for your own parenting tool belt but also to walk your children through the pages and teach them in the times of peace that Jesus has keys and solutions so that they can use them in their time of need. Children are hungry for the tools of heaven to be the answer and solution to what concerns them!! Buy one for your teen and usher them to encounter Him in their pain and process. 

Heart Splinters BOOK – Let the Children Fly

BELONGING

I love this testimony from my friend: “Last week one of my kiddos came home from an after-school class very distraught. He had experienced some relational pain with his peers and did not ever want to go back to this class. While I know I didn’t handle the situation perfectly; I tried to ask questions, listen and empathize. Then I shared some stories where I had had similar experiences as a kid, and I chose to quit almost every time. I told him I always wished I had the emotional capacity and support I needed to stick those hard situations out and see them through. He seemed responsive and willing to keep trying. But when that class came again this week, the panic alarm sounded, and he told me he would not go. I ended up getting him to class, honestly not knowing if I was making the right call. I got into my car to drive away with a plan to reach out to his class teachers, and then I also fervently prayed for him with two of my other kids. We asked God to intervene and show up in class today miraculously. When I went to pick him up, I saw that the teachers had called him after class, so I walked up to see what was going on. They had been seeing that he was struggling and were able to recognize and validate the issue he was having with one of his peers. Then they shared how much they valued him and how sad they would be if he left the class. They gave him a place of belonging and showed him how wanted he was. I almost burst into tears on the spot. God had heard my prayers and cared for my boy as only He could. My son left encouraged, seen, and more committed than ever to his class. Thank you, Jesus, that you hear when we cry out to you. You are our provider! And thank you for providing a beautiful school with a loving staff. My heart is full and oh so grateful.”

NOT JUST FOR PARENTS

One of my spiritual daughters shared this sweet testimony of ministering to a young gal. Our JOURNEY class is not just for loving your children but all of His children. 

“Hi Lisa, here is a testimony I wanted to share with you. The lessons I have learned through Let the Children fly helped me lead her to Christ for this healing. This girl is not a mom yet and is struggling with some insecurities and lies that she believes. So I walked her through writing down those lies and tearing them up, stomping on them, rejecting the lies, and how to instead accept God’s truths, as you taught me in the JOURNEY class. Here is her testimony on what that did for her: ‘Hey! So I finally had the guts to do it last night. I wrote down all the lies and things that kept hurting me in my mind and flushed them down the toilet. It came out to be about six pages worth of crap. It took me a while to get the courage to do it. The crazy part is that I wrote it in a red marker, and about halfway through ripping it, I realized that red represented Jesus’ blood. I was just choosing a marker, and I chose the red one. I was praying while doing it. I feel so much better now like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I feel like I can accomplish and do what I am called to do now. It sounds cheesy, but I feel free now and confident in myself and the Lord. It’s already been a blessing that He took those lies and stomped on them! I’m so excited to live! To truly live freely! No more bondage!’”

PLAYING IN THE KINGDOM

I dare to say your child has a greater capacity to release the Kingdom more than most adults because it takes FAITH and childlike faith is a gift from the Father to partner with Him. I keep sensing God highlighting children ages 4-8 and how they will be the ones releasing the Kingdom in great measure, children who haven’t yet been taught about fearing man, legalism, or church politics. These are the children who simply hear their Father and marry it with childlike faith and reap a harvest of fruit.

YOU NEED TIME TO GROW YOUR WOOL

Years ago, God showed me that I was still operating in a position of shame, like a black sheep (even though I know I am not one). I saw myself with black fur on me and was processing with the Lord how to get the black fur off of me. I figured He would show me how to come out from under it since it was a false garment. Instead, I had a vision where Jesus came to me like a rugged Australian sheep farmer and began to shave all of the wrong-colored wool off of me. When He was done, I was naked and automatically ran into the midst of all of the older sheep who had thick white wool. There was a sense of being protected and safe amongst them. I asked the Lord why He shaved me. He said, “You need time to grow your wool.” It is okay to be naked and vulnerable to shed our old position, operating systems, mindsets, and behaviors. It is already finished, but I was walking out my revelation of it. We need to be protected amongst healthy leaders and safe environments in our down-to-the-bone nakedness.

TENDER HEART

I want to talk about compassion – for yourself. Compassion simply means having tenderness towards the areas that cause our hearts concern. Compassion is a balm to our hurting hearts. While it would be fabulous if everyone around us ministered this ingredient to our hearts daily, it doesn’t often work that way. In reality, when we aren’t able to be compassionate to our own heart, it makes it even harder to receive it from others.

When was the last time you sat and intentionally championed your own heart?

Many of us feel traces (or bucket fulls) of shame during the day – shame over our looks, belonging, parenting or relationships. The only antidote to shame is compassion. Shame can’t be rebuked, ignored or fixed. It only leaves when compassion is smeared all over it.

I encourage you to print the following list out or write a few of them on a sticky note and place them on your mirror. Speak them over yourself at LEAST once a day but allow them to be your go-to when your own heart needs tenderness.

It feels silly, I know. But trust me when I say that applying compassion to your own heart is a key to connecting with His heart because we can’t receive (from Him and others) what we don’t give ourselves. This is quite simple, yet deeply profound.

  • I see you trying so hard
  • I am proud of you
  • I am sorry you feel sad
  • I am sorry you feel alone
  • I am sorry you feel scared
  • I can tell you care so much
  • Take all the time you need
  • You are going to be ok
  • I will sit with you until you feel safe
  • I accept you
  • I value you
  • I am sorry you feel trapped
  • I think you’re brave
  • I don’t want to get rid of you
  • I don’t see you as broken
  • I see you
  • I enjoy you

How does this make you feel?

What was it like reading the list?

What kind of parent/person would you be if you were a pro at being tender to your own heart?

HE FORGIVES ME

“I asked my daughter to ask Jesus what lie she was partnering with tonight after she was caught lying and sneaking (which is something she has struggled with for a while). She said, ‘God is angry. He is nervous that I will lie and be sneaky again.’ So I asked her which kingdom partners with anger – she answered the enemy. Which kingdom partners with nervousness? – the enemy. I told her to close her eyes again and ask again. This time she smiled wide and said, ‘He forgives me and is happy and wants to help me not to lie and be sneaky.’ The weight I saw lift from her was undeniable. She was later dancing joyfully to worship music my husband had been playing in the kitchen.”

TUNING YOUR HEARING

I was coaching a mom whose daughter was believing lies about herself. When the mom asked her to ask Jesus, she said, “I don’t hear Him speaking to me.” The mom went on to say she hears Him well when she worships and isn’t sure how to help her ‘hear.’ I encouraged her to have her daughter take the statement she believed about herself and turn it into a song. If it was life-giving, brought peace, and one that people would sing at Church, she could be assured it was a true statement about herself. If the church wouldn’t adopt her song, neither should she. Oh, baby girl, your spiritual ears work just fine!!

INTIMACY WITH THE FATHER

I will share a very vulnerable part of my story with you. My parents had a nasty four-year-old court battle over their divorce. My three siblings were naturally closer to my mom, and I was naturally closer to my dad. I was affected greatly by his leaving, and my mom couldn’t handle my sadness over the man with whom she was so angry and bitter. She began to ask me if my dad had ever done XYZ in the name of sexual abuse. She never told me he did it, but she would always ASK me. I would get mad and defensive as her questions were gross and uncomfortable. As the years went on, she would have other adults in my life approach me: my friend’s parents, my doctor, dentist, chiropractor, school counselor, and teachers. Everywhere I went during my childhood, that nagging question haunted me. As I got older, it became apparent that since adults do not lie, something must have indeed happened. But something must be so grossly wrong in me that #1. I do not have a single memory of anything ever happening, and #2. I still loved and missed my dad. I wondered what sick human loves and misses someone who does such things. I partnered with the spirit of suicide (which is not just about death but about getting you to turn against yourself). Self-hatred was easy, and suicide was natural for me. I spent three months in a coma, barely alive. When I was in my early twenties, I set out to face the horrible things my mom had implied that my dad had done. Years of dead-end secular counseling only left me to conclude that I was one messed up chick! It wasn’t until I found a ministry that operated through hearing God’s voice that I was set free. God clearly showed me that nothing had ever happened and that it was just a LIE that my mom had used to get back at my dad because she felt threatened by our closeness. That lie, from her own wounded heart, almost cost me my life!! I flew to MN, showed up at my dad’s office unannounced, and declared him not guilty. He dropped to his knees and sobbed like a baby. We had seven glorious years together, and he was able to meet all of my children before he passed away. This isn’t a mom-bashing story at all. It is a real testimony to show how our own wounds can affect the way we parent. If we are not walking in freedom, our children deal with the ‘fruit.’ There is HOPE, HELP, and HEALING for us as parents so that we can parent well. Let the Children Fly is simply my love gift back to my mom with the tools she needed but didn’t have when I was a child.